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Analysis: Looking back at the 1949 Strictly Stock Tracks
2020.09.21 18:56 GodModeBasketballAnalysis: Looking back at the 1949 Strictly Stock Tracks
It's time to turn back the clock all the way back to the beginning as the 1949 Strictly Stock Schedule and all 8 tracks that hosted a Cup race:
Charlotte Speedway: Not to be confused with the current Charlotte Motor Speedway, this 3/4 Mile dirt track started it all. Although Glenn Dunaway won the race, it was later found out that he was disqualified for illegal springs. As a result, Jim Roper was declared the winner(Fun fact: Roper was the grand marshal for the Spring Texas race on NASCAR's 50th Anniversary season, in 1998). The track would host only one more race, in 1950, won by Tim Flock. The track was forced to be demolished due to Interstate 85's extension into Virginia.
Daytona Beach and Road Course: The longest track to ever host a NASCAR Race(4.2 Miles), this track was instrumental in creating NASCAR as a whole, with the Streamline Hotel being right in the middle of it. It was a unique course in the sense that the backstretch was the Daytona beaches while the front stretch was Highway A1A. NASCAR President Bill France Sr used to race on the track in the 1940s and later would be NASCAR's first CEO. The track would be abandoned after France Sr constructed the famed Daytona International Speedway in 1959. Both the beaches and Highway A1A are still around.
Orange Speedway: Also known as Occoneechee or Hillsboro, Orange Speedway was a 1-mile dirt oval, set in the woods of Hillsboro, North Carolina. This track stuck around longer than most, hosting 33 more Grand National races until it was dropped after the 1968 Grand National season. The track is still around as a forest park. Bit of a spoiler, this is the only dirt track to still be preserved from the schedule.
Langhorne Speedway: One of the most feared and dangerous speedways, Langhorne was a 1-mile flat oval with little banking. The track would later gain infamy as 3 of the first 4 drivers to die in NASCAR all occurred at Langhorne. The track was not on the 1958 Grand National schedule. However, it still held the Langhorne Open, one of the most prestigious Modified races on the calendar. The track was finally closed in 1971. Currently, a Restaurant Depot, a Sam's Club, and a CarFax sit on the remains of Langhorne.
Hamburg Speedway: Not much is known about Hamburg Speedway. However, the track was a half-mile dirt oval located in Hamburg, New York. The track would host only 2 cup races throughout its existence, with Jack White winning the first and Dick Linder winning the second. The Erie County Fair sits at the site of Hamburg Speedway.
Martinsville Speedway: The oldest existing track to still have a Cup date, as of 2020. Martinsville is a track just over a half-mile in the shape of a paperclip. Red Byron, that year's champion, won the first running of Martinsville. Ever since then, Martinsville, besides the 1949 season, has held at least 2 races on the calendar, a Spring race and a Fall race.
Heidelberg Raceway: A track that held Grand National races off and on throughout its existence, Heidelberg was a 1/2 mile dirt track, located in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. The track would host 4 Cup races, in 1949, 1951, 1959, and 1960(Fun Fact: The last time Heidelberg held a race, Lee Petty and his son Richard finished 1-2). The track was still around in 1973, when it held a Grand National East race, won by Tom Colella. Raceway Plaza sits on the remains of Heidelberg.
North Wilkesboro Speedway: And lastly, North Wilkesboro. North Wilkesboro was a 5/8 mile track located in North Carolina. Tim Flock's brother, Bob Flock, won the inaugural running. The track was a mainstay of the series, hosting 2 Cup races each year from 1950 to 1996. In 1995, Track President Enoch Staley passed away from a stroke. Bob Bahre took up a 50% stake of North Wilkesboro. The track would host their final 2 races for 1996. The track is still around, but it is in tatters. The two dates North Wilkesboro had turned into the inaugural Texas Motor Speedway and a 2nd race at New Hampshire.
News Heading into Wednesday August 19th 2020 NOTE: PLEASE DO NOT YOLO THE VARIOUS TICKERS WITHOUT DOING RESEARCH. THE TIME STAMPS ON THE FOLLOWING ARTICLES MAY BE LATER THAN OTHERS ON THE WEB. THE CREATOR OF THIS THREAD COMPILED THE FOLLOWING IN A QUICK MANNER AND DOES NOT ATTEST TO THE VERACITY OF THE INFORMATION BELOW. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR VETTING YOUR OWN SOURCES AND DOING YOUR OWN DD.
GNCA Genocea -1.8% as holders file to offer 21.39M shares
VRNA Verona Pharma Initiates Multiple Dose Part of Phase 2 Clinical Trial with pMDI Formulation of Ensifentrine in COPD (Overnight News).
AXDX Accelerate Diagnostics up 13% on FDA emergency use nod for COVID-19 test (Overnight News).
CYDY CytoDyn requests “Fast Track Approval” in U.K for COVID-19 trial (Overnight News).
HUD Dufry to buy rest of Hudson in $311 million deal (Overnight News).
BTG B2Gold Continues to Operate Unimpeded at its Fekola Mine in Mali (Overnight News).
REGN Regeneron teams with Roche to triple supply of its COVID-19 drug (Overnight News).
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ON ON Semiconductor Announces Upsize and Pricing of Private Offering of $700 Million of 3.875% Senior Notes (Overnight News).
RXT Rackspace Technology Announces Results of Global Cloud Budget Survey, Uncovers the Hidden Complexities of IT Spend Management (Overnight News).
GS Booking app Omio raises $100 million in travel recovery bet (Overnight News).
CHGG Chegg Prices Offering of $900.0 Million of 0% Convertible Senior Notes Due 2026 (Overnight News).
FUTU Futu Announces Pricing of Offering of 9,500,000 American Depositary Shares (Overnight News).
BCOV Streamed Video Content Dominates Media and Entertainment Consumption According to the Brightcove Q2 2020 Global Video Index (Overnight News).
ORCL Trump Expresses Support for Oracle to Buy TikTok (Overnight News).
BX Takeda preparing to sell Japan consumer health unit to Blackstone: Kyodo (Overnight News).
NOVA GAF Energy and Sunnova Launch Strategic Partnership to Expand Roof-Integrated Solar Options for Homeowners (Overnight News).
EQNR Equinor’s share saving plan allocates shares (Overnight News).
AAPL Apple Revamps Music Radio Service With A Rebranded Beats 1, And Two New Stations (Overnight News).
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NI NiSource Inc. Announces Pricing and Preliminary Results of its Any and All Tender Offer
WU Western Union Now Available at CARD Bank (Overnight News).
INBX Form S-1MEF (registration adding securities to prior form s-1 registration [rule 462(b)]) filed with the SEC
GILD Gilead comes up empty with U.S. application for filgotinib for rheumatoid arthritis
MIDD The Middleby Prices Upsized Offering of $650 Million Convertible Senior Notes Due 2025
U.S., China to expand airline flights between them to eight per week. (UAL, DAL, CEA, ZNH)
JUUL MO Juul E-Cigarette Getting FDA Review to Stay on the U.S. Market
HRMY Form S-1MEF (registration adding securities to prior form s-1 registration [rule 462(b)]) filed with the SEC
CDNS Cadence's John Wall to Present at KeyBanc Future of Technology Series
EHTH EHealth chief bullish on future, increases stake to 703K shares
ZNGA Zynga Becomes Largest Mobile Game Maker by Market Share
CNDT Conduent +3.2% as it names Icahn's Gary to board for settlement
RMAX RE/MAX 2020 Broker Owner Conference Features Memorable Speakers, Valuable Lessons and the Launch of New Tools, Training and Technology for its Global Network of Entrepreneurs
CNNE Cannae Holdings Announces Investment in Foley Trasimene Acquisition Corp. II’s Recently Priced $1.3 Billion Initial Public Offering
BFT Foley Trasimene Acquisition Corp. II Announces Pricing of Upsized $1.3 Billion Initial Public Offering
RIO Rio Tinto cuts 2020 refined copper outlook on smelter restart delay in Utah mine
AR Antero Resources Announces Pricing of $250 Million Offering of Convertible Senior Notes
III Asia Pacific Sourcing Slumps in Q2 on Pandemic Concerns
QHRC Quest Resource Holding to Present Virtually and Host 1x1 Investor Meetings at the 11th Annual Midwest Ideas Investor Conference on August 26th & 27th
REV C Citi Resigns Role on Brigade CLO Deal Amid Escalating Loan Feud
REV C Citigroup wins freeze on funds mistakenly sent to Revlon creditors
RDFN Late-Summer Housing Market is Unseasonably Hot, Prices Up 10% and Pending Sales Up 13%
RPAI Retail Properties Of America Prices $400.0 Million Offering Of Senior Unsecured Notes
SRNE Sorrento Therapeutics -10.4% after CFO's ouster
STAR iStar Pricing $400 Million of Senior Unsecured Notes
CWT California Water Service Group Honored as Silver Stevie® Award Winner for COVID-19 Employer Response
JNPR Archdiocese of Brisbane Selects Juniper Networks to Provide AI-Driven Wi-Fi Solutions Across Its Operations
ROP Roper Technologies Prices Public Offering Of $300 Million Senior Unsecured Notes Due 2022, $700 Million Senior Unsecured Notes Due 2025, $700 Million Senior Unsecured Notes Due 2027 And $1 Billion Senior Unsecured Notes Due 2031
TTEK Tetra Tech Wins $29.7 Million USAID Renewable Energy Contract
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DMYD dMY Technology Group II Announces Closing of Underwriters’ Over-Allotment Option in Connection with its Initial Public Offering
GVA Granite Inliner receives C$12M sewer maintenance project in Canada
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2020.08.13 21:13 VictimOfFunThanks WotC for Standard 2021 Ranked queue
Maybe it's just me, and maybe because it's just the first day, but playing in the Standard 2021 ranked queue has been great. Interesting deck match ups, seeing "new" cards, and not having to deal with the worst cards for the last year is such a breath of fresh air. Far less BM emotes too from players as well as quicker turns! This Standard is much more fun, so thanks WotC. *I reserve the right to complain about ropers and new broken interactions at a later date!
2020.07.26 21:08 GanonsTesticlesUPDATE: Exterminator Party Encounter List
After compiling all the comments and adding a couple ideas I had floating around my head, this list is now 51 entries long! I appreciate everyone for contributing to this so far. Here's the list, as of now:
A bunch of highly militant kobolds have infested a cave on a noble's property
A pair of mountain Yetis has a problem with a ghoul infestation in their home, a long-abandoned snowy mansion
Goblins and their pet alligators have taken over the city's sewers
A leaderless, rag-tag group of orcs have settled in an abandoned village nearby, terrorizing the local populace
Noble thinks there's a ghost infestation in his daughter's room, turns out she's just having an affair with the stable boy
Evil spirits have settled in the local shaolin monastery, and have taken over some of the monks' bodies, driving out the remaining monks
Local brothel has found an as-of-yet undetected Succubus infestation after the owner gets his soul sucked out. Players get offered services instead of money as payment
Giant crickets infest a town. They are not too hostile (but will defend themselves) but their chirps are dangerous. (Deafing people, shattering glass, etc.)
A blacksmith infested by several flying swords and animated armours after a disgruntled wizard animated their entire stock.
A horde of Penguins has overthrown an aaracockra village through mysterious means.
oozes keep appearing in the nearby forest, hunt down the source and destroy it. There is an underground tunnel system filled with various oozes that lead to a large underground cavern with an Elder ooze that is growing and splitting. Epic maze and ooze perils awaits!
A wine cellar is infested with rats. Turns out a former employee is a pied piper of sorts, summoning rats to ruin the wineries reputation. Maybe they work with wererats too
Stirges have been plaguing the town recently, it's suspected they come from nearby cave. The cave actually leads to the underdark, there are ropers on the ceiling, and a more terrifying creature from the underdark lurks and forces the stirges out every night.
the recent flash flood had temporarily expanded the swamp into some farm lands. Now the farm land is infested with snakes, frogs and other swamp creatures
a shipment recently went down, a storm forcing it to crash into some rocks. Now it is surrounded by sharks and other sea creatures (even intelligent ones perhaps). Clear out the pests long enough for the supplies to be salvaged.
A wizard college hires them to clear out the dozens and dozens of imps that are a result of students failed Summoning and Binding exams. It is beneath the dignity of a professor to do so himself after all
A massive dragon-turtle turned island hires them to kill off the pirate crews that keep infesting its jungle
A witch hires them to kill off an invasive group of mephits that are killing the local ecology of her swamp
A Medusa hires them to deal with Basalisks that are eating up her garden
Elves hire them to remove pest trees from a small sacred forest. The problem plants need to be removed and burned before a particular date to prevent seeds being spread.
They are asked to de-ghost a local tavern. Cue Ghostbusters shenanigans.... The ghosts have unfinished business, and need a series of tasks to be performed, including a love letter delivered, a house to be completed, a song to be sung, etc. After the ghosts have been successfully laid to rest, the tavern owner realises the ghosts were the entertainment and soon insist on them putting the ghosts BACK.
A rich noble wants some ghosts cleared out of a townhouse so that he can develop (they arent hostile they just don't know their dead)
A dragon wants the party to clear out a cult of worshippers so he can actually get some sleep ( he tried roasting them but that just gained him more followers)
A rat like creatures home is infested with annoying human squatters ( a local bandit group hiding out in the sewers)
A child begs the group to help get a scary spider out of her secret den turns out its a giant spider nest
An ethically questionable baron is sick of the tabaxi wandering tribe that have set up camp on local farmland he gives the party a chance to remove them before he sends soldiers to do it the hard way
An elderly Orc barbarian chieftain hires the party to exterminate him as he is desperate to die in combat rather than of old age. The kicker is that the rest of the tribe must witness the combat and he won't give in easily
a wyvern has been spotted high in the foothills by a hunter, its behavior suggests it has a nest and more then likely some young that it is caring for. He won't go near it alone but he will pay you for clearing it out so he can hunt game safely (You can then give them multiple young wyverns to fight or eggs to smash depending on level etc)
something is making the river water of a small settlement rancid and people are getting sick. Up stream is a troll using the river regularly as a toilet as well as an area for dropping any trash. The troll is only there because something scared it out!of its cave to begin with. (Options to kill everything or give the troll his home back)
A lich was ousted out by his unionized minions as such he’ll hire the party to clear out his dungeon
31.A pack of trained war dogs survived a bloody battle. Without their masters they've begun to attack people on the roads. 32.A gorilla (or girralon) has claimed the elder tree in the center of town as their home. 33.In a cave often mined for valuable gemstones, swarms of bats have recently been attacking workers. The workers say it's because of a vampire who lives in the depths, but is that just a myth? 34.Oh crap.. the abandoned opera house is infested with vampires. 35.A Tribe of goblins hires the exterminators to take care of some adventurers that are plaguing their tribe. 36.The chief of the local lizard folk tribe has hired a bard to contact adventurers to help the tribe clear out a group of interlopers who have invaded the marsh-lands. The twist... the interlopers are a small pack of elven druids and rangers who have been hired to eradicate the lizardfolk and make the marshes suitable for colonization by a neighboring barony. 37.Runoff from a local wizarding university has mutated the local vermin into cranium rats. They've formed a hive mind and have begun kidnapping and controlling people. They must be stopped before they breed to a critical mass where they can take over the entire city. 38.A fancy multistory inn has long been the home to some sort of poltergeist, but it's been quiet for years. Most of the staff know about it, and the manager is hoping to have it quietly evicted before the guests start asking questions. 39.Exterminator exterminators. These guys are sent in to clean up exterminators that has gotten too investes in their jobs. 40.A mummer of mimics (1d20 + 10) has infested the local storage warehouse. Adventurers are offered 1gp per mimic exterminated plus any item(s) the mimic drops upon death. 41.The local stone quarry has been producing stone for several months with no change to the landscape. The local lord suspects a Medusa is responsible for this, but nobody has seen one to verify for obvious reasons. The lord wants the party to find and remove the Medusa. 42.Loggers were expanding into new areas of forest to collect wood but encountered a Treant, angry at their activities. It now stands at the edge of the forest, ready to fight them off. They ask the party to deal with the Treant. 43.Could be a fun one. I'll try to explain my idea (bear with me as I try to map this out in a way that'scoherent to another person). Make it so your party relaxes and spends time in a specific tavern and such after each mission, but there are also other teams (NCP's) that also go there. Eventually the PC's are tasked with removal of a pest at the tavern. They are given very loose definitions and must figure out what is actually the issue. For example: an attraction of rats to blood and gore waste, goblin hords because of the piles of treasures left behind. All linked but also non specific. And it turns out it's another party (or even themselves) thats ultimately the Issue because of their mess and gore from the fights dropping all over the place and attracting other pests. Thus the tavern owner wants the responsible party removed, but doesn't know who/what 44.I've got nothing for the list, strictly, but way to get right into the nitty gritty moral grey shit, being hired to exterminate sentient creatures. May as well have an orcish chieftain who wants a small commune of human druids exterminated because they're messing up the hunting in the area. 45.Go straight evil and have them catch escaped slaves for a corrupt politician
An unholy alliance between mind flayers and succubi: The succubi seduce and the the victims straight to the mind-flayers' lair! Who knows what they're getting in return, or what horrors are taking place in their lair? Locate, infiltrate, and purge!
Near town, a group of goblins has taken to creating a goblin monastery. The mayor believes them to be too much of a threat, so he hires the players to “kill them all, no survivors” for absurdly high pay. Insert them making tough moral choices when they encounter goblin women and children.
A female red dragon has recently died of natural causes, and now her hatchlings have begun to wreak all sorts of havoc on passing civilians.
A dictator in a rather faraway place (7 days travel) has taken to racially cleansing his city of orcs, and has managed to corner them in a ghetto, but they're too formidable to defeat with normal soldiers. Hires player party (best if at a high level), offers boatloads of money.
It's winter, and giant lizards have infested a noble's home, eating through his food supplies.
A tribe of kuo-toa have, through the sheer power of believing, created a new god. This god, however, suffers from severe depression and wants to commit suicide. This god, however, is only killable if the tribe dies, and doesn't have the heart to personally do it. So, he hires the player party and offers them one use of the spell “wish” before passing.
2020.06.21 00:04 AintEverLuckyList of Corpus-area bars & restaurants reporting COVID exposure in the last month
This list is a subset of the statewide bar & restaurant list maintained by the folks at ViralTexas Per the list, "Below are businesses that reopened on May 22, and then reported that an employee or customer tested positive for coronavirus after they reopened. If you have been to one of these locations, take extra precautions because you may have been exposed." The Corpus / Coastal Bend list includes:
Bourbon St. Sports Bar
Gemini Sushi and Business Lounge
House of Burgers
International House of Pancakes (unclear which location; this article indicates the IHOP on SPID near La Palmera Mall had switched to takeout-only, though the article dates back to June 11th.)
Disclaimer: This is an automated post, taking whatever is posted on Bethesda's news and copying it to Reddit. This is done as a courtesy for any users that can't view Bethesda's site, or prefer to use the Reddit feed to keep up on news. FC Mods are NOT Bethesda staff, and responding to this message won't get your message to Bethesda staff (they might see it if they stop by, but it isn't guaranteed). As always, for official feedback, go to the official fo76 subreddit, Bethesda forums, or Bethesda support page.
We’re releasing Update 19 for Fallout 76 today, which introduces Ally Customization, includes new and returning events, updates for automatic item naming, backpack skin improvements, and new limited-time Nuclear Winter Challenges and cosmetic rewards. We’ve also addressed a wide variety of bugs, including many issues reported by the community.
Update 19 Highlights
Ally Customization: Give your Allies stylish new looks by sharing your wardrobe with them using the new option to customize their outfits.
Hunt for the Treasure Hunter: Mole Miners have discovered treasure in the Ash Heap! Starting May 21, hunt them down to claim their loot for yourself during a new limited-time event.
Fasnacht Parade: By popular demand, this Seasonal Event is returning for a full week starting May 25, and there are plenty of new Fasnacht Masks up for grabs.
Item Naming Updates: We’ve made improvements to the way your weapons and armors are automatically named when you apply new mods and skins.
Backpack Updates: Changing your Backpack’s appearance is now as simple as applying a skin, and you can now apply them to Small Backpacks, too!
(NW) Limited Time Challenges: Unlock new cosmetic rewards by completing limited-time Challenges in Nuclear Winter, from May 19 – June 11.
Download size for today’s update will be around 10.7 GB for Xbox and 8.6 GB for PS4. For PC, the download size will be approximately 4.1 GB through the Bethesda.net launcher, and around 5.9 GB via Steam. * PC: 188.8.131.52 * PS4: 184.108.40.206 * Xbox: 220.127.116.11
Customize Your Allies
Starting today, you can now share your wardrobe with your Allies and swap their outfits to your heart’s content with Ally Customization. * When interacting with an Ally in your C.A.M.P., a new “customize” option will now appear that you can use to change their clothing. * Outfits, Headwear, Costumes, Armor—If you can wear it, then so can your Ally! The only current exceptions are Power Armor and Weapons. * Anything you dress your Ally in is purely cosmetic. They will not receive any buffs or bonuses from the apparel they wear. * Additionally, when viewing another player’s Ally, its name will be adjusted to include the name of the C.A.M.P. owner, e.g.: ’s Ally. * Please note that scrapping an Ally Station will revert that Ally to their default outfit. Allies will also appear to be in their default outfit if they are in an instance with you.
Hunt for the Treasure Hunter
Mole Miners are searching for riches around Appalachia, and you can hunt them down to claim their loot for yourself in a new series of limited-time “Hunt for the Treasure Hunter” events we’re introducing with Update 19.
Treasure Hunter Mole Miners
Use your keen tracking senses to hunt down Treasure Hunter Mole Miners to collect their Mole Miner Pails, which contain all of the loot they’ve been hoarding.
Treasure Hunter Mole Miners are legendary creatures, and you will hear them when they’re nearby.
Treasure Hunter Mole Miners can drop rewards from one of three different tiers: Dusty Mole Miner Pails (low), Mole Miner Pails (medium), and Ornate Mole Miner Pails (high).
The higher quality the Pail, the better chances for rare loot, including Outfits, Mounted Head Plans, a new Backpack Plan, and the Marine Armor Helmet Plan.
Pails can be traded and sold to other players, but cannot be sold to NPC vendors.
Craft Your Own Mole Miner Pails
While a Treasure Hunter event is live, Vendors around Appalachia will sell Empty Mole Miner Pails in exchange for Caps.
Use Empty Pails, along with a few additional materials, to craft full Mole Miner Pails of low, medium, or high-quality.
You can give or sell crafted Pails to other players, or keep them for yourself.
Head to the Ash Heap on May 21!
The first Hunt for the Treasure Hunter event will take place from May 21 – 25 in the Ash Heap region of Appalachia.
Future Hunt for the Treasure Hunter events will each occur in a different region.
Fasnacht Parade Marches Back to Helvetia
Starting next week, you can travel to Helvetia to take part in the Fasnacht Seasonal Event by helping the local Protectrons prepare for the town's annual celebration and parade. * Help the bots by hanging decorations, gathering ingredients for a feast, or playing musical instruments, among other activities, before the timer expires. * If you and your event mates complete the preparations in time, the bots will line up at the center of town to begin the parade. * Successfully guide the marchers to the end of their parade route, and you will be rewarded with loot! * The more marchers who survive, the higher your chances at rare loot, which may include Fasnacht-themed C.A.M.P. plans and a chance to earn a fancy Fasnacht mask. * We’ve added a number of festive new masks this year, and adjusted their drop rates following community feedback. While some are still less common than others, they should drop more often this time. * You can also trade your Fasnacht Masks to other players, if you wish. * Fasnacht Parade will begin every hour at the top of the hour starting on May 25. The event will last for a full week, so you'll have plenty of chances join in the celebration!
Automatic Item Name Improvements
With this update, we’ve improved how the game automatically names your weapons and armors based on their mods, legendary attributes, and Atomic Shop paints. * Going forward, automatically generated names will appear in a much more consistent order, and they will reliably include an item’s main attributes. * Additionally, Atomic Shop paint and skin names no longer overwrite the item’s primary legendary effect name. * Items should now generally follow this naming convention: Primary Legendary Attribute Name + Atomic Shop Cosmetic Name + Mod Name + Weapon Name * If you have a legendary Gatling Gun with the Black Knight paint and a Prime Receiver, for example, its automatically generated name should now be: Anti-Armor Black Knight Prime Gatling Gun * Keep in mind that you can still give your items custom names, which will override their automatically generated names. * Please note: Given the many combinations that are possible through all the different mods, legendary effects, Atomic Shop paints, and item types, there may cases where new item names appear incorrect. * For example, certain elements may appear out of order, or might be missing from the name. * These are visual issues, and all your mods should still function correctly. Please let us know if you spot any naming bugs on your gear after today, and we will squash them.
Backpack Appearance Updates
We’ve improved Backpack customization so that you can now apply different appearances to your Backpacks as skins—no more crafting required! * Head to an Armor Workbench and use the modify menu to swap the appearance of your existing Backpack with any skins you’ve unlocked through quests, events, or the Atomic Shop. * Skins can now be applied to Small Backpacks, as well for those who have not yet unlocked the normal Backpack Plan by completing the “Order of the Tadpole” quest. * You can apply skins to your existing Backpacks, as well as any new ones you craft.
Art and Animation
BBQ Grills: Get hungry! When using a BBQ Grill, your character will now appear to flip and grill some tasty steaks.
Grognak’s Throne: We’ve added a new animation that will play when sitting in Grognak’s Throne so that you can survey your land with the royal confidence.
Liberty Prime Power Armor: If you’re a strong silent type, you may be pleased to know that we’ve added an alternate version of the Liberty Prime Power Armor helmet that will not play voice lines while you’re wearing it.
Players who own the Liberty Prime Power Armor can now craft the silent version of the helmet at a Power Armor Station.
Limited Time “Survivors” Challenges – Unlock Themed Cosmetics!
We’ve added 8 Nuclear Winter Challenges that you can complete to earn new “Survivors” themed cosmetic rewards starting today, and lasting until 7:00 p.m. ET on June 11.
One new challenge will appear in the Character Challenge menu each day until all 8 are available, and they will remain available until the end of the event.
You can earn the first reward with 150 Overseer XP, and the last with 2,500 Overseer XP. All others will each require 2,000 Overseer XP.
Overseer XP you earn will roll over from one Challenge to the next, but they must be completed one at a time and in order.
As you complete each Challenge, you’ll be able to claim new themed rewards, like new furniture for your C.A.M.P., “Survivor’s Denim” and Ghillie Suit outfits, as well as skins for Nuclear Winter’s newest weapons: The Bow, Cattle Prod, and Gauss Shotgun.
New Weapons: The Bow, Cattle Prod, and Gauss Shotgun have been added and tuned for combat in Nuclear Winter matches. Find them in Supply Crates as you scavenge for gear.
Art and Animation
Animations: Dying while playing an instrument no longer causes the instrument to become invisible after respawning.
Animations: Fixed an issue that could cause the Overseer to slide out of her chair before standing.
Animations: Fixed a rare issue that could cause the player to fall through the world during character creation.
Lighting: Optimized the lighting inside the Overseer’s house and The Wayward to address performance issues.
Textures: The Clandestine Gauss Pistol skin now appears correct when applied to the Drum Magazine mod.
C.A.M.P. and Workshops
Allies: No longer sometimes attack the player’s other C.A.M.P. objects and Turrets.
Build: Moving C.A.M.P. locations now correctly closes the Build Menu for teammates who had it open while in the original build area.
Collectron Station: The Communist Collectron will now find Propaganda Flyers less often while scavenging.
Display Cases: Assigning an item to a Display Case no longer sometimes prevents the player from crafting other items of that same type.
Exploit: Addressed a duplication exploit related to C.A.M.P. objects.
Exploit: Addressed an C.A.M.P. budget exploit.
Lights: Bulb Lights no longer consume more C.A.M.P. budget than intended.
Lights: The Klaxon Wall Light can no longer be turned on if it is not connected to a power source.
Locks: Locked objects in players’ C.A.M.P.s now better indicate to players who do not own them that they will become Wanted if they pick the lock.
Trees: Can now be placed on a wider variety of terrain types.
Turrets: Addressed an issue that could cause C.A.M.P. Turrets to attack each other.
Workbenches: Players can now correctly use Workbenches immediately after an NPC has used them.
Workbenches: Exiting a Power Armor Station no longer sometimes causes the controls to temporarily lock up.
Stealth: Receiving Stealth from multiple sources at once, like the Escape Artist Perk Card, Stealth Boys, Chameleon Armor, etc. no longer causes enemies to instantly detect the player.
VATS: Changing the body part selection in VATS while using charging weapons, like a Bow or Gauss Weapon, no longer causes the next shot to hit the previously selected body part.
Blood Eagles: No longer sometimes drop weapons that have Nuclear Winter mods as loot.
Scorched: Fixed an issue causing more boss Scorched to spawn on top of Thunder Mountain Power Plant than intended.
Wendigo Colossus: Fixed an issue that could cause the Wendigo Colossus to suddenly stop taking damage.
Daily: Lou’s Mine, Foundation, and Crater now have locations that are considered sub-terranean for Challenges like “Level Up in Caves and Mines.”
Exploit: Addressed an exploit that could allow players to complete certain Tadpole and Possum Challenges repeatedly for rewards.
Social: The “Claim Different Workshops” Challenge no longer requires the Spruce Knob Workshop, and the number of Workshops needed to complete the Challenge has been reduced from 20 to 18.
World: The "Complete Different Daily Quests" now correctly appears in the World category after completing the “Complete an Event While in a Group” Challenge.
Armor: Secret Service Chest Armor can now be repaired beyond 100% condition using Perk Cards like Fix It Good.
Exploit: Addressed an Ammo exploit for weapons that use Fusion Cores as ammo.
Fusion Cores: Fixed several issues that could prevent weapons that use Fusion Cores as ammo, like the Gatling Laser, from firing correctly.
Gas Masks: Raider Skull Gas Masks now correctly remove other headwear when equipped.
Headwear: Fixed an issue that could prevent a character’s body from rendering when wearing the Communist Militant Hat.
Headwear: The Free Radicals Mask is no longer a legendary item, which is now consistent with all other headwear.
Jet Packs: Fixed an issue allowing Jet Pack Power Armor mods can now only be applied to the torso.
Outfits: Backpacks now correctly appear while wearing the Mountain Scout Outfit.
Power Armor: The Settler Vigilante paint no longer removes Rad Resistance from T-51 Power Armor.
Power Armor: Removed references to Vault 94 when crafting Strangler Heart Power Armor.
Power Armor: Fixed an issue that could cause another player to appear to be idle inside their Power Armor while they were actively using a Power Armor Station.
Underarmor: Corrected the name of the Plan to craft Secret Service Underarmor, and moved Secret Service Underarmor to the Underarmor category in the Armor Workbench.
Weapons: Gauss Shotgun mods now correctly require the Science Master I Perk in order to craft them.
Weapons: Commander Daguerre’s final quest now correctly awards a level 50 VATS Unknown Alien Blaster to characters over level 50.
Weapons: Gatling Guns now correctly display a fire rate of 20 in the Pip-Boy.
Allies: Speaking with Commander Daguerre immediately after Fast Traveling during her questline no longer sometimes prevents Emerson from visiting.
Dialogue: Exiting and quickly re-entering dialogue with an NPC should no longer result in a notification stating “This individual is busy.”
Frida Madani: No longer sometimes walks away during a conversation with a player.
Jide: No longer clips into the stairs in front of The Wayward.
Purveyor Murmrgh: Fixed an issue that could prevent players from interacting with the Purveyor in first-person view.
Random Encounters: The Settler that shoots at Opossums during a random encounter no longer always spawns at level 1.
Smiley: If a player has purchased all of Smiley’s Gold Bullion for the week, he will no longer continue to ask if they’re interested in buying more.
Performance and Stability
Server Stability: Fixed a number of issues that could result in a server crash during normal gameplay.
Server Stability: Fixed a stability issue caused by large stacks of inventory items.
Server Stability: Addressed a server crash that could occur when updating players’ quest targets.
Server Stability: Fixed a server crash that could occur while playing in a Private World.
Server Stability: Fixed an issue that could cause a server crash in Nuclear Winter.
Client Stability: Addressed an issue that could result in a client crash during normal gameplay.
Client Stability: Fixed a rare issue that could result in an infinite loading screen and a crash when loading into a world from the main menu.
Client Stability: Fixed a crash that could occur when opening a Perk Card Pack.
Client Stability: Fixed a crash that could occur on Xbox One when building in a C.A.M.P.
Quests and Events
All That Glitters: Fixed an issue that prevented the “Clear out the Security Forces” objective from completing correctly.
Ally Quests: Quest markers no longer fail to reappear after logging out and back in while in the middle of an Ally quest.
Ally Quests: Fixed an issue that could result in duplicate Ally quest items remaining in the world without quest markers after the player logged off.
Ally: Thicker Than Water: Fixed an issue that could prevent the player from receiving the Thicker Than Water quest after completing An Eagle Flies Free.
Ally: Narrow Escape: Beckett no longer appears in Rollins Labor Camp when the quest is not running.
Ally: Thicker Than Water: Animations: Beckett now correctly faces the player when speaking to them during scenes with The Claw.
Ally: Thicker than Water: Fixed an issue that could allow a player to enter Watoga Civic Center through a locked door.
Ally: Thicker than Water: Addressed an instancing issue that could occur when progressing this quest while on a team.
Ally: The Universe Conspires: Fixed an issue that could prevent Emerson from visiting and block progression when attempting to turn in the quest to Commander Daguerre.
An Ounce of Prevention: Moved the T-Type Fuse from Greg’s Mine Supply to the Charleston Trainyard so that it is easier to find.
Back on the Beat: Addressed an issue that could prevent this Public Event from starting.
Buried Treasure: Fixed an issue that could block progression after interacting with the intercom as the raiding party enters the security room.
Exploit: Addressed a reputation exploit affecting a conversation with Meg.
Exploit: Addressed an exploit that could allow players to complete the Vital Equipment daily quest multiple times per day.
From Russia With Lev: Fixed multiple discrepancies between Lev's subtitles and dialogue.
Fun and Games: Backing out of a conversation after asking Ra-Ra to enter the Power Armor room no longer causes her to become unresponsive.
Fun and Games: Ra-Ra no longer becomes unresponsive after destroying the Protectrons she spawns.
Fun and Games: The Sentry Bot in Grafton Steel Underground can no longer be damaged while it is still in the Fabricator, and will no longer exit the Fabricator early.
Fun and Games: Ra-Ra will no longer path to nearby Protectron corpses instead of entering the first vent.
Fun and Games: The “Follow Ra-Ra” objective no longer persists after finding and collecting Bunnabun.
Fun and Games: A terminal in Grafton Steel Underground that was previously unhackable can now be hacked correctly.
Heart of the Enemy: The lockpicking skill requirement for door between the Automated Research Program and the Reactor has been reduced from 1 to 0, so that the quest is easier to complete for players who are missing Lockpicking Perk Cards.
Overseer, Overseen: The Overseer will now exit combat and move toward the player when she is too far away.
Project Paradise: Fixed an issue that could sometimes prevent Project Paradise from completing after killing the Alpha Predator.
Random Encounters: Fixed an issue that prevented players from receiving loot during a random encounter with a Settler Apprentice after selecting Raider-themed dialogue options.
Safe for Work: Players are no longer required to pick the lock on the Medical Center crate to obtain Patrol Tape 04.
Secrets Revealed: Duchess no longer speaks her post-Vault 79 raid dialogue before the player has completed Secrets Revealed.
Secrets Revealed: After progressing the “Resolve the Situation with Johnny” objective, the player’s conversation with him will now end correctly.
Secrets Revealed: The Vault 79 elevator code objective now reappears correctly when returning to the elevator.
Secrets Revealed: Fixed an issue that could cause team members to be moved outside to Appalachia when the Team Leader entered the elevator to the Gold Operations Center.
Siding with Crater: Meg no longer forces the player into conversation if they back out before deciding whether to side with the Raiders.
Strange Bedfellows: Acquiring the Photo of Rosalynn’s Memorial prematurely no longer blocks progression during Strange Bedfellows.
Strange Bedfellows: Quest items obtained during Strange Bedfellows are now correctly removed after completing the quest.
Strange Bedfellows: Added a new objective directing players to complete the prerequisite quest Signal Strength before progressing to Strange Bedfellows.
Strength in Numbers: Polly’s head now correctly deals damage in VATS, and deals increased damage based on how many times it has been charged.
The Elusive Crane: Mort no longer appears to be standing idle during a scene with Roper in The Wayward.
The Elusive Crane: Fixed an issue that could cause the “Find Crane’s Treasure” objective to persist in the Pip-Boy’s quest description.
The Ol' Weston Shuffle: The Dud Explosive Collar is now correctly removed from character models after completing the quest.
The New Arrivals: The quest tracker no longer displays two “Talk to the Overseer” objectives under certain conditions.
Sound Effects: The Stanley skin for Grognak’s Axe no longer plays its sound effects twice when equipped or when switching between first and third-person view.
Sound Effects: Repeatedly entering and exiting a Gold Press Machine no longer causes it to play multiple overlapping sound effects.
Controls: Opening the Pip-Boy while attempting to Fast Travel during combat no longer sometimes causes the controls to become unresponsive.
Crosshairs: Now correctly change to an open square when passing over placed items that the player can interact with or pick up.
Fanfare: Treasury Notes no longer play legendary item fanfare when removing them from the Stash.
Login: The password field is now cleared correctly after entering an incorrect password while attempting to link a Bethesda.net account to Fallout 76.
Menus: Fixed several issues that could cause the Favorites menu to suddenly appear while Emotes menu was open.
Notifications: Equipping headwear by holding the action button no longer generates an error message stating “Unable to equip item.”
Pip-Boy: The item stats card no longer persists when switching to an empty tab in the Pip-Boy.
Press and Hold: Holding the action button to equip, learn, or consume an item in the world now works more consistently.
Quests: Daily quests the player has rejected in the Pip-Boy no longer automatically reappear after logging out and back in.
Quests: Fixed an issue causing placeholder text to appear when viewing Miscellaneous quests on the Map.
Quests: Reclamation Day no longer disappears from the completed section in the Pip-Boy’s Main Quests tab.
Sorting: The Spoil sorting option now correctly organizes Aid items by their remaining condition.
Tag for Search: The magnifying glass icon now appears correctly on Junk items in the world that contain components the player has tagged for search.
Trade: Players can now inspect items when trading with other players.
Vending Machines: Stacks of U.S. Government Supply Requisition Holotapes or Technical Data no longer sometimes disappear after being assigned to a Vending Machine.
Workbenches: Radio Vacuum Tube preview images no longer extend beyond the edge of screen in the Tinker's Workbench.
Cranberry Bog: The Wendigo Colossus no longer gets stuck in the trenches in Cranberry Bog.
Forest: The Wendigo Colossus no longer gets stuck on the guardrails in the road near Slocum’s Joe.
Forest: Fixed a terrain issue that could cause players to appear to float in front of Lacey and Isela outside Vault 76.
Savage Divide: The basement door in the Mountainside Bed & Breakfast no longer locks itself if the player leaves the area and returns.
Settlements: Yao Guai and Scorched no longer spawn in NPC settlements, like Crater, Foundation, or Big Bend Tunnel East.
Toxic Valley: Removed a non-functional hatch door from the Clarksburg Pharmacy.
NPCs: Corrected pathing issues for several NPCs that can be found in the world.
Nuclear Winter Bug Fixes
C.A.M.P.: Updated the lists of buildable and non-buildable Atomic Shop objects in Nuclear Winter.
C.A.M.P.: Removed a non-functional activator from the Scrapbox when it is built in Nuclear Winter.
Localization: Restored missing characters on the Nuclear Winter Map Voting screen in the Japanese version of the game.
2020.05.03 20:37 did_i_fall_asleepAdolf Hitler was not only an atheist, he was explicitly anti-religion. It's time to stop denying historical fact.
In the long run, National Socialism and religion will no longer be able to exist together. [On a question from C. S., whether this antagonism might mean a war, the Fuehrer continued:] No, it does not mean a war. The ideal solution would be to leave the religions to devour themselves, without persecutions. But in that case we must not replace the Church by something equivalent. That would be terrifying! It goes without saying that the whole thing needs a lot of thought. Everything will occur in due time. . . . The heaviest blow that ever struck humanity was the coming of Christianity. Bolshevism is Christianity's illegitimate child. Both are inventions of the Jew. The deliberate lie in the matter of religion was introduced into the world by Christianity. Bolshevism practises a lie of the same nature, when it claims to bring liberty to men, whereas in reality it seeks only to enslave them. In the ancient world, the relations between men and gods were founded on an instinctive respect. It was a world enlightened by the idea of tolerance. Christianity was the first creed in the world to exterminate its adversaries in the name of love. Its key-note is intolerance. Without Christianity, we should not have had Islam. The Roman Empire, under Germanic influence, would have developed in the direction of world-domination, and humanity would not have extinguished fifteen centuries of civilisation at a single stroke. Let it not be said that Christianity brought man the life of the soul, for that evolution was in the natural order of things. The result of the collapse of the Roman Empire was a night that lasted for centuries.
Trevor-Roper, Hugh, ed (2000). Hitler's Table Talk 1941-1944. Trans. N. Cameron and R.H. Stevens (3rd ed.). New York: Engima Books. LCC DD247.H5 A685 2000. ISBN 9781929631056. Night of 11-12 July 1941; pp. 6-7. I want to start this post off by stating that the intention here is not to argue or in any way corroborate the claim that atheists are inherently more likely to be immoral, violent, or evil. Only a fool would believe that religiosity, or a lack thereof, can be indicative of one's moral character. But the historical fact is that Adolf Hitler was an atheist. Our culture is obsessed with Nazis. They're a media trope, they're ubiquitous in political rhetoric to the point that we have Godwin's law, and they're making a big comeback the world over. But very few people are really all that familiar with Nazi ideology. Contrapoints has made a few really good videos on the topic, and the one I'd recommend for some background knowledge for this context would be her video Degeneracy. To give you the basic idea, we'll discuss degeneracy. One of the core components of Nazi ideology was that German society was deteriorating or degenerating as a result of what they deemed as "undesirables." These were Jews, queer people, the disabled, etc. It is the case that Hitler often invoked the Christian God in his propaganda. But this was a political tool. He desired, and probably was obligated, to galvanize the religious right in Germany and incorporate them into his NatSoc movement. But Hitler himself despised these people.
The reason why the ancient world was so pure, light and serene was that it knew nothing of the two great scourges: the pox and Christianity. Christianity is a prototype of Bolshevism: the mobilisation by the Jew of the masses of slaves with the object of undermining society. Thus one understands that the healthy elements of the Roman world were proof against this doctrine. Yet Rome to-day allows itself to reproach Bolshevism with having destroyed the Christian churches! As if Christianity hadn't behaved in the same way towards the pagan temples.
Hitler viewed Christianity as an invention of the Jews. Have you ever heard of the term Cultural Marxism? Yeah, it's an anti-semitic conspiracy theory that states that Jewish intellectuals are infiltrating Western institutions in order to destroy them. People who believe in that stuff think that things like the Queer rights movement, Feminism, racial equality, etc are being pushed into mainstream culture as a way to weaken Western society. It's a direct continuation of the Cultural Bolshevism propaganda pushed by Nazi Germany, in which...Jewish intellectuals were infiltrating German institutions to yadda yadda. Hitler viewed Christianity as another means through which Jewish people destroyed societies. It is the case that Christianity is a descendant of Judaism, and Hitler believed that it was Christianity that led to the fall of the Roman Empire. You can see this in the quote I have at the beginning of this post. Some key elements of the quote include the following.
In the long run, National Socialism and religion will no longer be able to exist together.
I can't emphasize this enough. Adolf Hitler viewed religion as antithetical to his ideology.
The heaviest blow that ever struck humanity was the coming of Christianity. Bolshevism is Christianity's illegitimate child. Both are inventions of the Jew.
Bolshevism is one of the biggest enemies of Nazi ideology. Hitler is describing here his beliefs regarding the conception of Bolshevism. It goes Judaism -> Christianity -> Bolshevism. The arrows don't really do the idea justice: Hitler actually believed that Jewish people developed Christianity with the aim of destroying Roman society. He seeks to eliminate Judaism, Christianity, and Bolshevism.
Let it not be said that Christianity brought man the life of the soul, for that evolution was in the natural order of things. The result of the collapse of the Roman Empire was a night that lasted for centuries.
This is important, because it will lead us to develop the next idea. Adolf Hitler did often touch upon a certain sense of spirituality, but it was with the specific goal of reviving indigenous Germanic mythology, rather than anything close to Christianity (which, I reemphasize: he absolutely despised and believed to be responsible for the fall of Roman society). Why is this important? Because Adolf Hitler wanted to develop a fully autonomous Aryan society, with its own language, genetics, history, and culture. Hitler viewed Christianity as a form of Jewish imperialism. One that wiped out his people's true culture. As an aside, a lot of this stuff would later go on to inspire more contemporary white genocide conspiracy theories. Anyway, here's a relevant quote.
It seems to me that nothing would be more foolish than to re-establish the worship of Wotan. Our old mythology had ceased to be viable when Christianity implanted itself. Nothing dies unless it is moribund. At that period the ancient world was divided between the systems of philosophy and the worship of idols. It's not desirable that the whole of humanity should be stultified—and the only way of getting rid of Christianity is to allow it to die little by little. A movement like ours mustn't let itself be drawn into metaphysical digressions. It must stick to the spirit of exact science. It's not the Party's function to be a counterfeit for religion. If, in the course of a thousand or two thousand years, science arrives at the necessity of renewing its points of view, that will not mean that science is a liar. Science cannot lie, for it's always striving, according to the momentary state of knowledge, to deduce what is true. When it makes a mistake, it does so in good faith. It's Christianity that's the liar. It's in perpetual conflict with itself. One may ask whether the disappearance of Christianity would entail the disappearance of belief in God. That's not to be desired. The notion of divinity gives most men the opportunity to concretise the feeling they have of supernatural realities. Why should we destroy this wonderful power they have of incarnating the feeling for the divine that is within them? The man who lives in communion with nature necessarily finds himself in opposition to the Churches. And that's why they're heading for ruin—for science is bound to win. I especially wouldn't want our movement to acquire a religious character and institute a form of worship.
Wotan is a German name for the Germanic god Odin. While Hitler is expressing here that he does not want to simply revive these old traditions (I'll get to that later), it does corroborate the rest of what I said. Adolf Hitler was a hardcore Scientist. In fact, his ideology was a particularly violent culmination of Europe's developing Scientism, particularly the large body of work that had been done on what we now call scientific racism. One of the biggest influences in Nazi ideology was French author Arthur De Gobineau, who wrote the book Essay on the Inequality of Human Races, which is widely considered to be one of the cornerstones of scientific racism, and was fundamental for the development of the idea of the Aryan master race. To quote the book,
"The word degenerate, when applied to a people, means that the people no longer has the same intrinsic value as it had before, because it has no longer the same blood in its veins, continual adulterations having gradually affected the quality of that blood....in fact, the man of a decadent time, the degenerate man properly so-called, is a different being from the racial point of view, from the heroes of the great ages....I think I am right in concluding that the human race in all its branches has a secret repulsion from the crossing of blood...."
Arthur de Gobineau (1855) Essay on the Inequality of the Human Races.
I don't know if there's any historical confirmation on whether or not Hitler read this book, but he practically copypasted his entire ideology from its pages. Pay attention to the word "decadent." This word is used in conjunction with "degenerate," which you'll recall I discussed above. If degenerates were the ones causing European society to decay, said decay was a result of their decadence. Decadence was seen as a sort of Hedonistic indulgence, whether it be through sexuality, substances, or... Jewishness? Well, yes. The Cultural Bolshevism conspiracy theory insisted that Jews were using art to destroy German society. The Modernist artistic movement was labeled decadent by Nazi ideology, as it marked a transition from art as strictly representational to more abstract modalities. And guess who was thriving in that scene? Jews. So of course Jewishness was decadent; after all, look at their art. (I know I still haven't gotten to pre-Christian Germanic mythology. I'm getting there). The point is that Jewish developments were decadent. It didn't matter what they were. Or more often, weren't, since Nazi ideology even blamed Jews for the existence of gay people. And gay people were decadent because...people didn't like them, and their sex doesn't necessarily make children, and children are the future of the Aryan race. Or something. I gotta remind people here that I don't agree with any of this hogwash; I'm just telling you what the Nazis believed. Anyway, remember how Hitler viewed Christianity as a direct construction of the Jewish people? Yeah, so now Christianity and the Church are decadent in the eyes of Hitler. Think I'm making this up? Read this quote.
It is a great pity that this tendency towards religious thought can find no better outlet than the Jewish pettifoggery of the Old Testament. For religious people who, in the solitude of winter, continually seek ultimate light on their religious problems with the assistance of the Bible, must eventually become spiritually deformed. The wretched people strive to extract truths from these Jewish chicaneries, where in fact no truths exist. As a result they become embedded in some rut of thought or other and, unless they possess an exceptionally commonsense mind, degenerate into religious maniacs. It is deplorable that the Bible should have been translated into German, and that the whole of the German Folk should have thus become exposed to the whole of this Jewish mumbo jumbo. So long as the wisdom, particularly of the Old Testament, remained exclusively in the Latin of the Church, there was little danger that sensible people would become the victims of illusions as the result of studying the Bible. But since the Bible became common property, a whole heap of people have found opened to them lines of religious thought which—particularly in conjunction with the German characteristic of persistent and somewhat melancholy meditation—as often as not turned them into religious maniacs. When one recollects further that the Catholic Church has elevated to the status of Saints a whole number of madmen, one realises why movements such as that of the Flagellants came inevitably into existence in the Middle Ages in Germany. As a sane German, one is flabbergasted to think that German human beings could have let themselves be brought to such a pass by Jewish filth and priestly twaddle, that they were little different from the howling dervish of the Turks and the negroes, at whom we laugh so scornfully. It angers one to think that, while in other parts of the globe religious teaching like that of Confucius, Buddha and Mohammed offers an undeniably broad basis for the religious-minded, Germans should have been duped by a theological exposition devoid of all honest depth.
Trevor-Roper, Hugh, ed (2000). Hitler's Table Talk 1941-1944. Trans. N. Cameron and R.H. Stevens (3rd ed.). New York: Engima Books. LCC DD247.H5 A685 2000. ISBN 9781929631056. Midday 5 June 1942; p. 513. Have I made this clear enough yet? Adolf Hitler hated Christianity. He saw the church as an enemy of his ideology. Okay, so we've readily established that Hitler wasn't a fan of the church. But I did mention that Hitler and the Nazis attempted to construct a neo-Germanic mythos. And this is true, because it was of dire importance that Hitler have a means utilize what he saw as the Aryan man's innate divinity. The Aryan race needed an origin story that not only separated the Aryan people from the degenerates, but elevated them above the Jews, the Blacks, the Gays, etc. BigThink has a decent article on some of this here. The long and short of it is as quoted.
Wiligut had developed a religion centered on worshipping the Germanic god Irmin. According to Wiligut, German culture dated back to 228,000 BC, a period of time when the Earth had three suns and was populated by giants, dwarfs, and other mythical creatures. He also claimed to be descended from a line of kings from this period of time. It should also be noted that Wiligut was a diagnosed schizophrenic. Himmler was particularly attracted to Wiligut's brand of paganism, as he disliked the Judaic origins of Christianity. After the end of the WWII, Himmler believed that the "old Germanic gods will be restored." Leveraging his influence and his boss's desire to see a Germanic paganism, Wiligut attempted to stamp out competing philosophies to his Irminism.
In case you don't know, Himmler was one of Hitler's right-hand men. He and Hitler were huge influences on each other in terms of Nazi ideology, and Himmler was one of the key architects of the Holocaust. So we see here a common vein in Nazis and their ideology: Christianity was an aberration of Judaism, and as such must be eradicated from Aryan society. So, finally, we can circle back to that quote we looked at earlier.
It seems to me that nothing would be more foolish than to re-establish the worship of Wotan. Our old mythology had ceased to be viable when Christianity implanted itself. Nothing dies unless it is moribund.
It's important to note that the definition of moribund is "(of a thing) in terminal decline; lacking vitality or vigor." So, Adolf Hitler was a huge believer in evolution. I am, too, but I'm not a racist about it. Hitler was, though. Point is: He believed that because indigenous Germanic mythology died out to Christianity, that it was bound to die sooner or later anyway. Hitler didn't personally adhere to any kind of Germanic religion, but there were points where he considered it ideologically advantageous to encourage its development over Christianity.
At that period the ancient world was divided between the systems of philosophy and the worship of idols. It's not desirable that the whole of humanity should be stultified—and the only way of getting rid of Christianity is to allow it to die little by little.
This is self-explanatory.
A movement like ours mustn't let itself be drawn into metaphysical digressions. It must stick to the spirit of exact science.
Yeah, so Adolf Hitler was a super hardcore Scientist. I really want to stress here that Scientism isn't just a respect for science. To quote Wikipedia
Scientism is the promotion of science as the best or only objective means by which society should determine normative and epistemological values.
And while I would disagree with this mentality, I wouldn't say that Hitler's Scientism is in any way typical of Scientism today. But it was a very important aspect of Hitler's ideology: Recall all that stuff about scientific racism? It was important that Hitler had a scientific and rigorous foundation to his racist ideas. The reason why is a little involved, and has to do with the Enlightenment philosophies of the time. We don't have time to get into that here so you'll have to look into that on your own. The point is that Hitler's epistemology was deeply and entirely scientific. At no point did religion factor into his personal views.
It's Christianity that's the liar. It's in perpetual conflict with itself. One may ask whether the disappearance of Christianity would entail the disappearance of belief in God. That's not to be desired. The notion of divinity gives most men the opportunity to concretise the feeling they have of supernatural realities. Why should we destroy this wonderful power they have of incarnating the feeling for the divine that is within them?
So this is what I was getting at earlier. Hitler (obviously) was completely enamored with the Aryan race, and he believed them to possess a sort of divinity, insofar as they were elevated and distinguished among humanity: The master race.
The man who lives in communion with nature necessarily finds himself in opposition to the Churches. And that's why they're heading for ruin—for science is bound to win. I especially wouldn't want our movement to acquire a religious character and institute a form of worship. It would be appalling for me.
Fin. "But look at all these times Hitler talked about God and Jesus!" Yeah, sure, and Donald Trump loves to give speeches at churches. This post is long enough as-is, so I'll just go ahead and quote Wikipedia.
In Hitler's early political statements, he attempted to express himself to the German public as a Christian. In his book Mein Kampf and in public speeches prior to and in the early years of his rule, he described himself as a Christian. Hitler and the Nazi party promoted "Positive Christianity", a movement which rejected most traditional Christian doctrines such as the divinity of Jesus, as well as Jewish elements such as the Old Testament. In one widely quoted remark, he described Jesus as an "Aryan fighter" who struggled against "the power and pretensions of the corrupt Pharisees" and Jewish materialism. While a small minority of historians accept these publicly stated views as genuine expressions of his spirituality, the vast majority believe that Hitler was skeptical of religion and anti-Christian, but recognized that he could only be elected and preserve his political power if he feigned a commitment to and belief in Christianity, which the overwhelming majority of Germans believed in. Privately, Hitler repeatedly deprecated Christianity, and told confidants that his reluctance to make public attacks on the Church was not a matter of principle, but a pragmatic political move. In his private diaries, Goebbels wrote in April 1941 that though Hitler was "a fierce opponent" of the Vatican and Christianity, "he forbids me to leave the church. For tactical reasons." Hitler's remarks to confidants, as described in the Goebbels Diaries, the memoirs of Albert Speer, and transcripts of Hitler's private conversations recorded by Martin Bormann in Hitler's Table Talk, are further evidence of his irreligious and anti-Christian beliefs; these sources record a number of private remarks in which Hitler ridicules Christian doctrine as absurd, contrary to scientific advancement, and socially destructive. Once in office, Hitler and his regime sought to reduce the influence of Christianity on society. From the mid-1930s, his government was increasingly dominated by militant anti-church proponents like Goebbels, Bormann, Himmler, Rosenberg and Heydrich whom Hitler appointed to key posts. These anti-church radicals were generally permitted or encouraged to perpetrate the Nazi persecutions of the churches. The regime launched an effort toward coordination of German Protestants under a unified Protestant Reich Church (but this was resisted by the Confessing Church), and moved early to eliminate political Catholicism. Hitler agreed to the Reich concordat with the Vatican, but then routinely ignored it, and permitted persecutions of the Catholic Church. Smaller religious minorities faced harsher repression, with the Jews of Germany expelled for extermination on the grounds of Nazi racial ideology. Jehovah's Witnesses were ruthlessly persecuted for refusing both military service and allegiance to Hitler's movement. Hitler said he anticipated a coming collapse of Christianity in the wake of scientific advances, and that Nazism and religion could not co-exist long term. Although he was prepared to delay conflicts for political reasons, historians conclude that he ultimately intended the destruction of Christianity in Germany, or at least its distortion or subjugation to a Nazi outlook.
Look, if what you're saying is contradicting Wikipedia, then you're probably just wrong.
2020.04.08 18:44 seikoturtleFRANKLY IN LOVE - David Yoon (September 2019 BOTM)
Good easy mindless read. Usually in tough times I look for a book that is light and easy to read. Especially now with the economic uncertainty and current lockdown situation resulting from CV. If you enjoyed “Permanent Record” by Mary H.K. Choi (September 2019 BOTM) there is a good chance you will enjoy this as well. Teen Love story that takes place during Frank Li’s Senior year of highschool in Southern California. So prepare yourself for SAT talk, slang, and modern meme references. As the son of Korean immigrants the Korean culture is heavily imprinted in his life. He falls for an American girl, who he has to date in secret because his parents want him to date a Korean girl. Frank's sister Hanna, married a non-korean and was practically disowned by her parents. To prevent that from happening, Frank decides to “fake date” a family friend whose parents also arrived in America from Korea around the same time as Frank's Parents did. Not quite the happiest ending like we have in “How Not To Die Alone” - Richard Roper (May 2019 BOTM) but it is not a cliffhanger, so at least that's good. I recommend this book if you are looking for an easy read to either get back into reading or just escape from the current CV Situation. Tip; Read the last paragraph in the acknowledgements, I usually skim them, but this time the last paragraph really hit. Next BOTM I read; DAISY JONES & THE SIX - Taylor Jenkins Reid (March 2019 BOTM) Did you read Frankly in Love? What are your thoughts, lets discuss!
2020.04.07 03:18 fathompinGenetic Evidence of Jewish Descendancy is Clear - Just Not the BoM Version of It
I love this story from about 2003: The challenge of determining the genetic background of Book of Mormon population groups has been compared with the Lemba ethnic group in southern Africa. The Lemba, a Black, Bantu-speaking people, practiced a religion very similar to Judaism, and had oral traditions that their ancestors were Jews who sailed to southern Africa from an ancestral land called Sena (Southerton 2004, p. 127). They also had a patrilineal priestly clan called the Buba. After the advent of historical genetics, it was found that the Lemba did indeed have a preponderance of genetic markers on their Y chromosome indicating over 80% of their ancestry was non-Arab Middle Eastern; and even that their priestly Buba clan had a high frequency of a set of genetic markers known as the Cohen modal haplotype, which has been found to strongly correlate with members of the Kohanim, or traditional patrilineal Jewish priestly clan, living in Israel (Southerton 2004, p. 128). It has been calculated that the Lemba separated from the main body of Jews about three to five thousand years before the present. The main group in the Book of Mormon is said to have left the Middle East about 2,600 years before the present. Therefore, it is argued, if the genetic evidence of Jewish descendancy remained so distinctly preserved in the Lemba during thousands of years of being surrounded by unrelated ethnic groups in southern Africa, there seems no reason why the same could not have been true of an analogous group in the Americas over about the same timeframe. In response to criticism regarding Amerindians' lack of these genetic attributes, LDS scholars have said that there is no indication that descendants of Levi were among Lehi's group, making the existence of these specific haplotypes unreasonable. They also say that it is more difficult to test Native American DNA for Israelite heritage since traditions of Jewish descent do not currently exist. The Lemba, on the other hand have maintained traditions of being descended from Cohen, or Levites, making it easier to test for their genetic inheritance (Roper 2003, p. 145). In the February 2003 issue of Science in Africa Dr. Himla Soodyal states,"Using mtDNA the Lemba were indistinguishable from other Bantu-speaking groups." MtDNA was the basis of both studies on American Indians. The Lemba look like Bantus and speak a Bantu language. Yet there is no doubt that the Lemba have male Israelite ancestors. The Y-chromosomes tell us this. My comments: I have this story sent to my e-mail every year to remind me of the Book of Mormon's complete lack of any genetic evidence, while there exists a similar migration story that is completely validated by genetic science. The date of an article I found is 2003, so it has been quite a few years I've been seeing it and I don't need reminding anymore, but I just love it. True-believing Mormons go on believing, even after a complete turn about of facts as I knew them growing up and the limited-geography spin. In the late 90's I followed the genetic developments with great interest just knowing there would be no support (because of the BoA, I knew then JS was a fraud). I still can't believe the fraud can't be toppled as easy as there being no genetic trace of the migration. http://www.scienceinafrica.com/biotechnology/human-origins/every-gene-tells-story
2020.04.02 20:59 johntempletonU.S. financial industry asking SEC to delay broker disclosure rule, citing coronavirus- sources
TLDR: Beer virus = brokers can't be bothered to filling out the conflicts of interest paperwork This ain't shady at all. Naw way. The financial industry wants the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission to hold off on parts of a new rule requiring brokers to disclose potential conflicts of interest, citing disruptions caused by the coronavirus, four people with knowledge of the discussions said. The so-called Regulation Best Interest rule is one of several the industry has been lobbying to delay or suspend as it struggles with staff working from home, volatile markets, and a flood of customer queries due to the pandemic. A delay would help free-up much-needed resources, the people said. One of the people with knowledge of the lobbying efforts, Daren Domina, an investment management partner at corporate law firm Haynes and Boone, said large brokers are still working to comply with the rule, albeit on a slower pace, while smaller brokers have made scant progress. “An extension applicable to all firms though would be the fairest result,” Domina said. The three other sources asked not to be named because they weren’t authorized to speak publicly on the issue. “Reg BI” requires brokers to disclose potential conflicts of interest, such as fees and the commissions they earn, when giving financial advice. It was due to go into effect on June 30, but industry is pushing for at least part of it to be delayed until Sept. 30. Specifically, compliance teams have been struggling with the rule’s Client Relationship Summary form, which outlines the specific fees, costs, conflicts and standards of conduct that apply to the different types of advice that brokers and advisors offer to retail clients, the people said. In a statement on Thursday, SEC Chair Jay Clayton said the June 30 deadline remained “appropriate” but indicated there could be flexibility. “I expect that the Commission and the staff will take the firm-specific effects of such unforeseen circumstances (and related operational constraints and resource needs) into account in our examination and enforcement efforts,” he said. With stay-at-home orders related to the coronavirus health crisis affecting so many staff as well as clients, compliance teams have been struggling with the coding and programming needed to bring the form online, the people said. The industry is also seeking guidance from the SEC that would help them more easily comply with the rule, the people said. The SEC has agreed to meet with industry associations to discuss the issue, but a date has not yet been set, two of the people said. Reg BI was widely seen as a win for Wall Street, which successfully fought off a more onerous investment advice proposal by the Department of Labor. Most notably, the SEC’s rule still allows brokers to recommend financial products that benefit them, provided they disclose the conflict. In September 2019, seven U.S. states and the District of Columbia sued to block the measures. Consumer groups who have criticized the rule for being too weak said that while they’re not normally sympathetic to industry requests, they were not against a delay. “We don’t think Reg BI offers substantial new protections for investors, so we don’t see a delay as denying investors of critical new protections,” Barbara Roper, director of investor protection at the Washington-based Consumer Federation of America, told Reuters.
Haven’t updated in awhile, but here’s some “light reading” for everyone while we’re locked in. These just crack me up. Enjoy, stay safe and wash up. 🧼 GETITON
Band Names/Rap Stars
Mitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS) ManAyz - Rap star (LL) D'Bagz - Rap star (LL) Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL) Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?) Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS) Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS) Gut Fluffer (ACS) Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS) Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL) Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS) Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS) Narthex - (ACS) Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS) Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS) The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS) Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS) 3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS) Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS) Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS) Jizz Grenade (LL) Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS) Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS) Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS) Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS) Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS) White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS) White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS) Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS) Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS) Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS) Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS) Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS) MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH) D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS) Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS) Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS) Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD) Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH) SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS) Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS) Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS) Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD) Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL) Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS) Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD) Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter) Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS) Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter) Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL) Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS) Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS) Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS) Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS) Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH) Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS) One Erection - A good boy band (ACS) Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS) Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD) Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS) The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS) King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS) Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS) Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS) The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS) Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS) Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS) Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS) Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS) Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS) Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS) The Bouncers - great band name (ACS) Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS) Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS) Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS) Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS) Sophistry - A great Carol King album (ADS)
Meatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?) Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS) White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS) Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS) No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS) Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS) Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS) Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS) Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS) That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS) Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL) Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS) 12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS) Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS) Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS) Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS) I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS) Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS) Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH) Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS) Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS) People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS) Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS) Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS) Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS) Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS) I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS) Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS) Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS) Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS) Anal ipecac - Good indie band (ACS) 2 Tits and a Pulse - Ace likes that Beck song (Bryan/Adam) (ACS)
Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS) Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS) L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS) Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS) DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS) Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS) DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS) Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS) N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS) Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS) Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS) Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS) Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS) Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS) Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS) Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS) Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS) Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?) Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH) Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS) Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD) Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS) Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS) Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS) Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS) Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH) Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH) Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter) Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS) Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS) Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACS Hardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS) Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS) Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS) World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS) LBJ - Worst Mexican wrestler name ever (ADS) Cold stone Steve Austin - Can’t wrestle on hot days. Tag team partners with the Klondike twins (GS) Cicely Tyson - Greatest Italian boxer of all time. (ADS)
Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:
Spoodini - (LL) Rocky Stucco - (AOTH) No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS) Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS) Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast) Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast) Kindle Fire (ACS) Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS) Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL) Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS) Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?) Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?) Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?) Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS) Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS) The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS) Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS) Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS) Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS) Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS) Backscatter - Porn technology (PM) Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH) Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH) Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH) Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM) Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS) Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS) Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH) 38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS) Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS) Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS) Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS) Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS) Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS) Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS) Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS) Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS) Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS) Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS) Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS) Europol - Another great porn name (ACS) Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS) Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS) Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS) Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH) Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS) The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J) Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS) Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS) Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS) Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS) The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS) Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS) Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS) Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD) Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH) Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH) Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS) Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?) Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS) Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS) Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS) Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS) Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS) Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS) Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS) Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS) French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS) Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS) Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS) Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS) Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS) The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD) Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS) Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS) Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS) Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH) Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS) Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS) Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS) The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD) 73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS) Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS) Madison Bear - Sounds like an dating app for gay hairy dudes who are married (ACS) Back pay - Good porn title name (ACS)
Trajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS) Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS) Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS) Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS) Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS) Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS) Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS) Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS) Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS) Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH) Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS) Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS) Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL) Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?) Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL) Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS) Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS) Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM) Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast) Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS) Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS) Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS) Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS) MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH) Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS) Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS) Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS) Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS) Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS) Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS) Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS) Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS) Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS) Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS) Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS) Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS) Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS) F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD) Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS) Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS) Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD) Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS) Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS) Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH) Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS) Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS) LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS) Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS) Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS) Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL) La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS) C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS) Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS) Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS) Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS) The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL) MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH) Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS) Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS) The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS) Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS) Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS) Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL) Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS) Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS) Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS) Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS) Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH) Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS) Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS) Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS) Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS) Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH) Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS) Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS) Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS) D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS) Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS) Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH) Beulah - The town horror (RD) Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS) Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS) Root Ball Grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS) Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS) Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS) Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS) Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS) Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS) Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS) Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS) Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS) Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS) Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS) Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS) Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS) Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS) Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS) Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS) Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS) Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS) Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS) Merch Galore - Worst Bond secretary ever. Total sellout. Always wearing her own swag (GS) Bathroom Goalie - New code for fat chicks sitting next to you on an airplane (ACS) Skip Loader -Kurt Loder’s older brother (ACS) F. Me Money - greatest attorney rapper ever (RD)
Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio Stations
Gum and Condoms - (Show?) Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS) Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL) Crockpots and Headphones (ACS) Booger and Floor Wax (ACS) Almonds and Water (ACS) Cold Butter And Calves (ADS) Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH) Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL) Fungus and Mold (Show?) Stupid and Petty (Show?) Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS) Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS) Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS) Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS) Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS) QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH) Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS) The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS) Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS) Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS) Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS) Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS) Mother Trucker - Adam’s Podcast with caller Miguel (AOTH)
Boobville - (LL) Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL) Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL) Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS) Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?) Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS) Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS) Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?) Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS) NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?) Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS) Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS) Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS) Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM) Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS) Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS) Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS) Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS) Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS) Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS) The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS) Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS) Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS) Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS) L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS) Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS) Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS) The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town) Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS) Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?) Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH) Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS) Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH) Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS) The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS) Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS) Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS) C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS) Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS) Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS) Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS) The Mexican Faire - Worst fair ever (ACS) Hanoi Hospice - Only place worse than the Hanoi Hilton (ACS) Kaleblazer- Gay juice bar (ACS) Hot Dog Cannon - good name for a bar next to The Abbey (ACS) Dyskeratosis - where Vinnie lives, lots of Greek folks, a family oriented community (ACS) Kind of, Italy - Where Ace’s family is from. Where he gets his kinky hair. (ADS)
Cleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS) Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL) The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS) Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS) RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS) Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS) Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH) Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS) Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS) Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS) El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS) Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM) Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS) American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS) E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS) Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS) SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS) Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS) Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS) G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS) Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS) Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS) The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS) Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS) Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS) Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS) Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS) Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH) Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS) Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS) My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS) Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD) Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS) Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS) Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS) Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS) Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS) Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH) Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter) Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS) Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS) The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS) Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS) Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?) Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS) Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS) Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS) Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS) Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS) A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS) Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS) Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS) Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS) USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS) Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS) Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS) Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS) Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS) Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS) Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS) Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS) Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS) Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS) 4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS) Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS) The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS) Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS) The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS) Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS) UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS) Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS) Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS) Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS) Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS) Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS) Sexual Battery - Batteries especially made for sexual devices. Somewhere between AA and C (ACS)
Deer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?) Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS) Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS) Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS) Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS) Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS) Black Dick - An English desert (ACS) Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC) Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS) GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS) University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS) Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS) Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS) Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS) Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH) Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show) GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS) Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS) Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS) Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS) Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS) Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS) Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS) Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS) Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS) Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS) Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS) The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS) Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS) Son of Goose - Worst vodka ever. Comes in a plastic squeeze bottle (ACS) Orange Hitler - Worst Hi-C flavor ever (ACS)
Cunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS) Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL) Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS) Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS) Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS) Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS) Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS) Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS) Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS) Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?) Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH) Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS) Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS) Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS) Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS) Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS) Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS) Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS) Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS) Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS) Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS) Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS) Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS) Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS) Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?) Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS) Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS) Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS) Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH) Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS) 2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS) So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS) Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS) Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS) LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS) Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS) Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS) The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS) The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS) Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS) Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS) Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS) Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS) Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS) Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS) Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS) Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS) Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD) Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS) Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS) Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS) Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS) Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS) L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS) Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS) Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS) Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS) Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS) Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS) Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS) Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS) Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS) Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACS Nanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS) Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACS Nick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT) Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR) The Baldwin’s and Beyond -Great reality show (RD) The Rogue Deuce - The next Star Wars movie (ADS) Mr. Goodbar To The Rescue - Ace loves that movie (ACS) Wrestling Squatters - New show on YouTube Red starring Eric Stromer (AOTH)
Books/Coffee Table Books
Dade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS) Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS) Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH) Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS) Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS) Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM) You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM) Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS) You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS) I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS) Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS) Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL) Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS) From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS) (The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS) I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS) Radio Station Kitchen (ACS) Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS) Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS) Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS) Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS) Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS) What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS) Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS) Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS) In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS) Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)
Native American Names
Chief Thunderbear (LL) Dances With Cocks (ACS) Dances With Lipstick (ACS) Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS) Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)
Absorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS) Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS) Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's G Cmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS) City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS) Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s V No Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS) Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS) Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS) Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS) Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS) Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS) The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS) Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS) B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS) Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS) El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS) Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?) Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS) El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS) Port of Karachi - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
2020.03.13 15:42 FindTheRiver80Bachelor Nation Astrological Signs (updated with Peter's season)
ARIES: Ben Higgins (23 Mar 89), Alexis Waters (24 Mar 93), Madison Prewett (25 Mar 96), Katie Morton (26 Mar 92), Olivia Caridi (29 Mar 92), Sydney Hightower (31 Mar 95), Becca Kuffrin (3 Apr 90), Andi Dorfman (3 Apr 87), Kelsey Weier (3 Apr 91), David Ravitz (3 Apr 92), Desiree Hartsock (8 Apr 86), Luke Parker (8 Apr 94), Amanda Stanton (9 Apr 90), Joe Amabile (12 Apr 86), Ashley Hebert (14 Apr 85), Natasha Parker (15 Apr 88), Dean Unglert (17 Apr 91), Adam Gottschalk (19 Apr 90)
TAURUS: Rachel Lindsay (21 Apr 85), Charlie O’Connell (21 Apr 75), Aaron Buerge (22 Apr 74), Blake Horstmann (22 Apr 89), Hannah Ann Sluss (Apr 25 96), Cassie Randolph (27 Apr 95), Nick Spetsas (27 Apr 91), Catherine Giudici (29 Apr 86), Grant Eckel (1 May 88), Tanner Tolbert (2 May 87), Bob Guiney (8 May 71), Wells Adams (16 May 84), Shawn Booth (18 May 87)
GEMINI: Onyeka Ehie (24 May 94), Deandra Kanu (29 May 96), Maurissa Gunn (2 Jun 96), Lucas Yancey (4 Jun 86), Lexi Buchanan (4 Jun 93), Whitney Fransway (6 Jun 91), Lorenzo Borghese (9 Jun 72), Jenna Cooper (9 Jun 89), Caelynn Miller-Keyes (15 Jun 95), Dylan Barbour (16 Jun 94), Tammy Ly (17 Jun 95), Kaitlyn Bristowe (19 Jun 85), Chelsea Roy (20 Jun 88)
CANCER: Whitney Bischoff (24 Jun 85), Byron Velvick (24 Jun 64), Clay Harbor (2 Jul 87), Sydney Lotuaco (2 Jul 92), Jason Mesnick (5 Jul 76), Courtney Robertson (5 Jul 83), Andrew Firestone (10 Jul 75), Kiarra Norman (15 Jul 96), Matt Grant (17 Jul 80), Kenny Layne (22 Jul 81)
LEO: Jen Schefft (23 Jul 76), Jef Holm (23 Jul 84), Raven Gates (23 Jul 91), Jasmine Nguyen (24 Jul 94), Chris Harrison (26 Jul 71), Sarah Cofflin (31 Jul 95), Alex Bordyukov (1 Aug 87), Peter Weber (4 Aug 91), Juan Pablo Galavis (5 Aug 81), Dustin Kendrick (5 Aug 88), Connor Obrachta (7 Aug 92), Alayah Benavidez (7 Aug 95), Chad Johnson (11 Aug 87), Tia Booth (11 Aug 91), Josh Murray (12 Aug 84), Christian Estrada (13 Aug 89), Leo Dottavio (14 Aug 86), Kendall Long (17 Aug 91), Garrett Powell (21 Aug 91)
VIRGO: Jordan Rodgers (30 Aug 88), Victoria Paul (30 Aug 92), Avonlea Elkins (1 Sep 92), Bibiana Julian (2 Sep 87), Tayshia Adams (4?/13? Sep 1990), Matt Donald (9 Sep 92), Ben Flajnik (10 Sep 82), Chris Bukowski (10 Sep 86), Meredith Phillips (13 Sep 1974), Ryan Sutter (14 Sep 74), Cam Ayala (15 Sep 88), Ali Fedotowski (16 Sep 84), Arie Lukendyk jr. (18 Sep 81)
LIBRA: Hannah Brown (24 Sep 94), Michelle Money (28 Sep 80), Nick Viall (29 Sep 80), Vanessa Grimaldi (30 Sep 87), Jesse Palmer (5 Oct 78), Victoria Fuller (7 Oct 93), Emily & Hailey Ferguson (9 Oct 92), Connor Saeli (9 Oct 94), Carly Waddell (11 Oct 85), Annaliese Puccini (12 Oct 84), Krystal Neilson (17 Oct 87), Luke Pell (22 Oct 84)
SCORPIO: Jason Tartick (24 Oct 88), Trista Rehn (28 Oct 72), Becca Tilley (30 Oct 88), Jojo Fletcher (1 Nov 90), Chris Soules (6 Nov 81), Brad Womack (10 Nov 72), Corinne Olympios (11 Nov 92), Tierra LiCausi (12 Nov 88), Jared Haibon (15 Nov 88), Sean Lowe (16 Nov 83), Kristina Schulman (16 Nov 92), Lauren Burnham (19 Nov 91), DeAnna Pappas (20 Nov 81), Angela Amezcua (20 Nov 89), Jade Gilliland (20 Nov 92), Jen Saviano (21 Nov 89)
SAGITTARIUS: Nicole Lopez-Alvar (23 Nov 92), Matt Munson (29 Nov 84), Sharleen Joynt (3 Dec 87), Sarah Herron (5 Dec 86), Derek Peth (6 Dec 87), John Paul Jones (8 Dec 94), Caila Quinn (10 Dec 92), Chris Siegfried (12 Dec 85), Chris Randone (13 Dec 87), Evan Bass (17 Dec 82), Jade Roper (19 Dec 86)
CAPRICORN: Mike Johnson (27 Dec 1987), Jillian Harris (30 Dec 79), Caroline Lunny (30 Dec 90), Brooks Forrester (1 Jan 84), Robby Hayes (5 Jan 89), Jordan Kimball (8 Jan 92), Kirpa Sudick (16 Jan 92), Jubilee Sharp (16 Jan 91), Jed Wyatt (19 Jun 94)
AQUARIUS: Colton Underwood (26 Jan 92), Jake Pavelka (27 Jan 78), Tyler Cameron (31 Jan 93), Kevin Wendt (1 Feb 84), Emily Maynard (1 Feb 86), Lauren Bushnell (2 Feb 90), Mykenna Dorn (2 Feb 97), Hannah Godwin (4 Feb 95), Andy Baldwin (5 Feb 77), Bekah Martinez (10 Feb 95), Britt Nilsson (12 Feb 87), Bryan Abasolo (15 Feb 80)
PISCES: Demi Burnett (21 Feb 95), JP Rosenbaum (23 Feb 77), Astrid Loch (23 Feb 90), Alexa Caves (27 Feb 92), Garrett Yrigoyen (24 Feb 89), Chase McNary (24 Feb 89), Kelley Flannagan (25 Feb 92), Seinne Fleming (2 Mar 90), Ashley Iaconetti (6 Mar 88), Eric Bigger (9 Mar 88), Travis Stork (9 Mar 72), Melissa Rycroft (11 Mar 83), Peter Kraus (14 Mar 86), Clare Crawley (20 Mar 81), Molly Mulaney (20 Mar 84)
Feel free to correct any of the dates if they're wrong and to add birthdates of people who aren't there. (I'm looking for the birthdates of Luke Stone, Alex Woytkiw, Devin Harris and Jane Averbukh.)
2020.01.29 19:03 tulsanewsbotWhat's happening around town (Wed, Jan 29th - Tue, Feb 4th)
Tulsa's event list.
Wednesday, Jan 29th
Build a Reader Storytime: Preschool(Owasso Library - Owasso) Start Time: 10:00am The best in children's literature, songs, games, finger plays, rhymes and other reading-related activities are shared with your preschooler. For ages 3-5.
The Birth of Loud: The Guitar Rivalry That Shaped Rock-n-Roll(Oklahoma Center for the Humanities - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm The Birth of Loud is “a hot-rod joy ride through mid-20th-century American history” (The New York Times Book Review), this one-of-a-kind narrative masterfully recreates the rivalry between the two men who innovated the electric guitar’s amplified sound—Leo Fender and Les Paul—and their intense competition to convince rock stars like…
Kids, Kows & More(Expo Square - Tulsa) Day 1 of 2 Registration Ends: January 24, 2020 Admission Cost: FREE Location: Exchange Center Event Information: Providing an interactive field trip opportunity for northeastern Oklahoma youth to learn about agriculture that is relevant in their surrounding areas. Grades: 2nd - 5th Activity Hours: 9am - 11:30am Activity Programming: Starting at 9:00am, all…
🎨 Adventures in Building (and Baseball)(Philbrook Downtown - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Conversation and Film Screening: Join artist Jack Sanders for a raucous and wide-ranging discussion on design and architecture as an immersive, participatory experience. Sanders is the founder of the Austin-based Design Build Adventure and Texas Playboys Baseball club. join us prior to the event for baseball trivia, prizes and cash bar. This…
♪ Artist Happening: Snobug(Philbrook Downtown - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:30pm JANUARY SERIES: SHADOW OF TIME ARTIST HAPPENINGS On Friday nights in January, artists and musicians transform the Helmerich Gallery into a space where visitors can experience music, dance, and performance. Snobug is a string trio experimenting with creative new sounds. The trio is comprised of Jordan Hehl, Matt Magerkurth, and Olivia McGraw.…
🎨 Daedalus Quartet at ahha(Hardesty Arts Center (AHHA) - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm Korngold’s quartet, rooted in the Austro-Hungarian tradition of Haydn’s music, has a modern character with the sweeping romanticism of his movie scores. An émigré to Los Angeles, he influenced a generation of American composers, including John Williams. Missy Mazzoli’s evocative music creates a portrait of Queen Mab, the fairy made…
Gilcrease After Hours: Game Night (FREE admission)(The Gilcrease Museum - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Gilcrease After Hours is our free, monthly evening of culture and cocktails that takes place the final Friday of each month from 7 to 10 p.m. With our galleries open late, special programming, live music and cocktails, this happy-hour style event has something for everyone. Gilcrease After Hours is sponsored by: Flint Family Foundation On…
Kids, Kows & More(Expo Square - Tulsa) Day 2 of 2 Registration Ends: January 24, 2020 Admission Cost: FREE Location: Exchange Center Event Information: Providing an interactive field trip opportunity for northeastern Oklahoma youth to learn about agriculture that is relevant in their surrounding areas. Grades: 2nd - 5th Activity Hours: 9am - 11:30am Activity Programming: Starting at 9:00am, all…
Mike Ryan with Erick Willis(Cain's Ballroom - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Cain's Ballroom welcomes Mike Ryan & Erick Willis to Tulsa, OK on January 31, 2020 Advance - $15 + fees Day of Show - $18 + fees Door - $22 Mezzanine (21+) - $30 + fees No re-entry! No smoking! No refunds! Support acts are subject to change without notice!
🎭 WWE Smackdown Live(BOK Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:45pm Sale Dates and Times: Public Onsale : Fri, 8 Nov 2019 at 10:00 AM Venue Presale : Wed, 6 Nov 2019 at 10:00 AM Oilers Presale : Wed, 6 Nov 2019 at 10:00 AM WWE Package Presale : Wed, 6 Nov 2019 at 10:00 AM Official Platinum Presale : Wed, 6 Nov 2019 at 10:00 AM Official Platinum Onsale : Fri, 8 Nov 2019 at 10:00 AM WWE Package Onsale : Fri, 8 Nov…
Saturday, Feb 1st
🍴 2020 Skiatook Chamber of Commerce Banquet(Skiatook Public Schools - Skiatook) Start Time: 6:00pm We are hosting Governor Kevin Stitt for our annual Chamber Banquet! 🥳 We would love you to join us! Buy your tickets before they are sold out! Contact the Chamber office at (918) 396-3702 or email us at [email protected]. #Skiatook #ChamberofCommerce #SkiatookChamber #Oklahoma
Tulsa Performing Artist Talent Search(Fur Shop - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm We are interested in any kind of performance art.... Dancers, dance teams, jugglers, buskers, magicians, sideshows, circus acts, stunts, character actors, contortionists and any other type of performance artists. Our masquerade is a highly visual fully immersive event, creative and interesting costuming is encouraged. Our featured musician…
🏃 Runway Run - benefitting Tulsa Air and Space Museum and Planetarium(Tulsa International Airport - Tulsa) 5K Run on the west runway of Tulsa International Airport. Walkers can start after the Runners have taken off. Runners who register by a midnight December 31 will receive a t-shirt. All runners and families receive free admission to the Museum until 1:00 pm. USATF sanctioned event.
♪ Voctave(Broken Arrow Performing Arts Center - Broken Arrow) Start Time: 7:30pm VOCTAVE: FEBRUARY 1, 2020 Voctave is an 11-member a cappella group from the Central Florida area. Formed in the winter of 2015, the voices that bring their artistic arrangements to life represent a wealth of diverse backgrounds and musical experiences. Group members have professional roots with Walt Disney World entertainment, but their range…
Sunday, Feb 2nd
🎓 Daedalus Quatet(Tulsa Performing Art Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 2:15pm The Daedalus Quartet crafts skillfully wrought performances that are technically superb and eloquently expressive. During 20 years as an ensemble, they have developed their distinctive voice as champions of American music. In concerts, the quartet thoughtfully pairs new compositions with familiar works, opening our minds to new understanding and…
🎓 Winter Talk 2020(Phillips Theological Seminary - Tabbernee Center - Tulsa) Thru Wed, Feb 5th Start Time: 9:00am The Seventh annual Winter Talk is a three day conversation on the Christian Doctrine of Discovery (DOD) and its influence on Christian theology and polity, with an emphasis on the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) relationship with Indigenous tribes and peoples. Hosted by the Yakama Christian Mission Council, and Phillips Theological…
Tuesday, Feb 4th
🎭 Theatre Tulsa Kendra Gives Back Party(Theatre Tulsa - Tulsa) Start Time: 5:00pm Enjoy sips, sweets, and jewels at Theatre Tulsa's Kendra Gives Back Party! Shop for your Valentine while giving back to your favorite local community theatre. 20% of all sales will go back to Theatre Tulsa. Can't make it? No problem! Give us a call at 918-770-8303 to place your order over the phone.
🎓 Winter Talk 2020(Phillips Theological Seminary - Tabbernee Center - Tulsa) 1 day left Start Time: 9:00am The Seventh annual Winter Talk is a three day conversation on the Christian Doctrine of Discovery (DOD) and its influence on Christian theology and polity, with an emphasis on the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) relationship with Indigenous tribes and peoples. Hosted by the Yakama Christian Mission Council, and Phillips Theological…
2020.01.18 19:38 UrsinefellowOutback Tale [Title Pending]
The massacre of Australian Aboriginal people in a 'war of extermination' was widespread and relentless. As one of the early missionaries, R.D.Joynt, wrote that hundreds had been "shot down like game". A huge London-based cattle consortium ‘The Eastern and African Cold Storage Company’ acquired massive tracts of land to carve out a pastoral empire from the Roper River north into Arnhem Land. Purchasing all stocked and viable stations along the western Roper River, they began moving cattle eastward. Determined to put down all Aboriginal resistance, they employed gangs of up to 14 men to hunt down all inhabitants of the region and shoot them on sight. With police and other authorities maintaining a "conspiracy of silence", they staged a systematic campaign of extermination against the Roper River peoples. They almost succeeded. - G. Leitner, I. G. Malcom, Elyssa traced her hand up the Cows leg, finding her hip bone, from there she applied pressure near the right side of Macy’s lower abdomen. She felt something solid writhe within her, a Calf. She sat back against the fence-post with a sigh of relief, and smiled at Macy. The Cow went on placidly feeding and didn’t pay her any mind. She weighed up an estimate of when the new Calf would be born, perhaps February, she thought, swatting a bug away from her glistening forehead. The Heat was becoming more intense by the minute as the sun found its zenith, and the outback of the Roper River valley was unforgiving to anything be it ungulate or otherwise. “Casey!’ Elyssa called. Her Daughter appeared from behind their tool-shed. “Go inside, get some water boiled, we’re having Pasta tonight.’ The Girl beamed, and ran into their Colonial ranchers home. Elyssa pulled herself to her feet and vaulted the fence separating the shaded stable area from the open Desert Plains. As she headed for the River, she noted the presence of a dozen Kangaroo’s that had found their way onto her land, a more than common occurrence. Her uncle Bill came to mind, he was always in the mood for some shooting, and always had time for a Roo steak dinner. She thought that she might invite him over at some point. He’d been facing with the local Mining clique trying to muscle him off his land, and could certainly use some stress relief. At the River, she bucketed some water, and dunked it over her head to keep the possibility of heat-stroke at bay. The sudden cold relief inspired optimism for the future, and It dawned on her that the prospect of rearing a new Calf called for celebration. After Tea, she dropped Casey off at Bill and Gladice’s house, then took to the road into town for a few drinks at the Pub. The Sun was barely over the horizon, and the orange glow made the Desert a beautiful sight. The Radio was incessant with its politics. Droughts were hard enough on the people of Australia, and Wildfires had torched much of the land near North Queensland, but the only topic on peoples minds were the radical changes imposed by the new Government. The APA, Anarchist Party of Australia, had taken a torch to the Law books, courts, and justice systems, imposing a simple and in theory elegant rule: The Non-Aggression Policy. The Government no longer had a mandate to punish crimes, nor to uphold any systems that can do so officially, instead people were permitted freely to punish those who trespass against them as they see fit. She gripped the wheel as the President John Creswell pitifully justified his administration, the impatience in his tone made her sick. “Respect the NAP, and you’ll be safe, disrespect the NAP, and you will get what you deserve. These amendments put the law into the hands of the Australian people. You are in charge of your own destiny, it is yours to manifest-‘ She switched off the radio in a huff, and decided a double-whiskey was more appropriate than a beer. “How’s someone meant to protect themselves against a fucking Mining Corporation, cunt.’ The local was a flat-roof free house, what little room the pub had was often taken up quickly as day dimmed to night. Karaoke and local music was a regular occurrence and Beer was more available in these parts than Water most of the year. That meant Drunks, lots of them. She’d never seen a fight break out in the Arnhem Grillhouse, but plenty of abysmal dancing, and emotional episodes if the Weather permitted. With the heat causing so many problems she figured tonight was certainly going to be tense, but she’d be long gone before anything kicked off. She seated herself at the Bar, and was already through her first Jack Daniels on the rocks when she overheard talk of Alfie the Alawa. Who was taking full advantage of the vagueness of the NAP act with growing severity. “That’s the thing, my Dad wants the lease Papers checked out, but what the fuck good’ll that do? There’s no Court I can go to, not to my knowledge. Everything’s gone tits up. I think I might just move on,’ Said a local Dairy farm owner living up-river from Elyssa “He’s just Posturing, if you don’t give into his demands, then you’ll be fine.’ The man across from her said. “Nah he’s been getting a lot more brazen recently Aaron. I found my Chickens, five of them, all cut up, left outside my door. I’ve heard from other people in the area he’s done worse. You know Craig Hill, the fella who owns the small mine-shaft east of Town? All he did was sell off whatever Opals he can get his hands on, fella lived pay check to pay check, and yet apparently Alfie’s boys did him in. Broken fingers and all. He’s moved on, and guess who’s Company Logo is plastered all the Do not Tresspass signs in the area now?’ “Shit.’ Aaron took a slug of his Beer, mulling something over in his head. “Look, it’s clear Cresswell’s gonna be in charge for longer than anyone expected.’ He raised his voice, “Maybe it’s time the folks around here all chipped in, and got the Police to help.’ The Pub quietened. “Fuck off,’ Alex Warbler spoke up. A dour-faced lad of twenty going on thirty in appearance, “I’m not spending any of my hard-earned cash making sure some cunt’s farm is saved, ain’t a fuckin’ Disney movie.’ “Ey, you’ll change your tune when Alfie comes by your place to kick your fat fucking head in, son!’ Aaron said, standing and pointing his finger. Alex shot up from his stool, sending it clattering on the floor. “Oi! Both of yous! Sit down and shut up, people’re tryna have a good time around here.’ The Bar Owner Trisha bellowed. “We all know the Mine-owner’s been extra picky about people’s properties,’ She reached under the bar and slammed a Long-barrel shotgun onto its hard surface. “But keep one of these on you, and you’ll be A-OK. He won’t risk his life tryna get you to sign off on a patch of dirt, no matter how much coppers under it.’ Alex and Aaron finished their display of Machismo, cutting a cross-pub staring contest short with no victor, and returned to their alcohol. Things began to settle down, but even so, Alfie the Alawa was on everyone’s mind thereafter. The Door to the pub swung open abruptly, and what was a quiet and nervy environment went deathly quiet. The Three men who entered were sporting the Alawa Copper Co. Logo on their uniforms, which were dust-covered and a sickly yellow in colour. As they approached the Bar she necked her Whiskey and left right as they seated themselves. On the Drive home, the Radio was channels were still saturated with talk of the present administration. She listened in on a Debate over the validity of the Election, keeping her tipsy eyes glued to the empty road. “The UTF and the Unions were all primary influences in the vote for Cresswell, and there’s documents to suggest meetings occurred between key figures of the Miners union and the UAF. It’s clear this the Non-Aggression Act was a byproduct of their wanting to strip our country of its defence against—’ She grew tired of it all, and fumbled with the knob to silence the radio. The UTF, United Tribal Front, were an organisation focussed on the upkeep of Indigenous rights in Australia. She had little opinion of them, or Cresswell. Her mind was on her Pregnant Cow, the Health of her land, and her Daughter. Arriving home, she stumbled up stairs and flopped onto her bed. She took a framed photograph off of her nightstand, and kissed it. “Goodnight honey,’ She said, to the image of her late husband. Elyssa let the photo rest on her chest, and slowly fell asleep. Just as quickly as she drifted into unconsciousness, a ear-splitting scream roused her, and she fumbled out of bed and down the stairs toward the sound of Casey’s voice. “What’s wrong Dearest,’ She said in a soft voice. “What’s the matter?’ She held her daughters shoulders in the downstairs hall. “Macy’s dead!’ She cried. “What? What do you mean sweetie?’ It was then that she noticed the smell, and her hangover became immediately worse. She looked toward the Kitchen door threshold, and saw a puddle of red. She swallowed a breath, and told Casey to wait in her room. Upon investigating the kitchen, her stomach was the first to react. She threw up in the sink and tried to regain her composure to no avail. The room had become a butchers shop. Macy had been cut at the throat and dropped into her home. Everything that could be covered in blood was, and what looked like non-descript viscera had been left on the central island. She forced herself to look closer, and upon inspection discovered it was Macy’s premature Calf forcefully removed. She forced herself to scan the room, and saw that upon the window was scrawled in Macy’s blood the letter A. Alawa. “Jesus fucking Christ.’ Bill said, placing a coffee down before her. “I mean, A, what else could that mean?’ She pondered. Gladice walked into the Living room with a frightened expression, “She won’t even eat the Chocolate Fudge Brownies, never mind the Bacon and Eggs. She’s shellshocked Billy!’ “Casey’s not eating?’ Elyssa asked urgently. “She’ll be fine, she’s just frightened, give her time.’ Bill urged. “Bloody Abo’s! They’ve wreaked nothing but havoc on this community for years since the War ended.’ Gladice spat, storming off. Bill sighed, his eyes drifting to his Medals on the Mantle-piece. He was a Cavalryman, and fought in UAF insurgents across the Northern Territory during what was dubbed on ones side as the Extermination War, and the other as the Bloody-River Conflict. A chain of land disputes across the Roper River Valley fought throughout the 1970s and 80s. “You’ve gotta put that shit in the bin Uncle.’ She sighed. “Gladice likes to think she married a War Hero honey, they’re for her, not me.’ As she sipped on her Coffee she felt her headache receding. “I might take Casey into the City.’ She said. “Why not let her stay here? She’ll be safe.’ “Alfie’s boys come by here too Uncle, nowhere on the Rivers safe. Do us a favour though, mind the ranch? Don’t try to stick up for it if they come in numbers but, watch the Cattle eh?,’ “Will do, will do. I thought you should know, this happened at the Grillhouse last night. I know you like to stop by for a drink every now and then,’ He lifted a magazine from the coffee table, revealing the morning news underneath. The front page displayed a Picture of young Alex Warbler, and an obituary. “What happened?’ “Alex probably started it to be fair, but a fight broke out. Trisha kicked all four of them out brandishing that big boomstick o’hers. The Miners tailed the poor lad. Jumped him in a dark alley, and left him for dead.’ On the drive to Jabiru, Casey remained silent. Elyssa tried to coax some reaction by playing her favourite pop songs, but her eyes were fixed to the back of the passenger seat. Passing through the Town, there was a distinct diversity. White’s and Aboriginals walked the streets without avoiding each other’s stride. In the wake of the War neither group seemed keen on segregating themselves. She parked outside an overnight Hotel and rented out a Room. Casey and Elyssa sat staring out the window, playing a game of Yellow Car. Casey seemed attentive, and pointed out every Yellow Car that passed by before her mother did, even though she let her. “Tired love?’ Casey nodded gently, her eyelids flickering. Elyssa tucked her into bed, and gave her a kiss on the Forehead. She left the Hotel room, and made her way to the local Police Station. Dashed on the floor outside the Station were protest signs from the night before. How many $$ is a life worth? Read one. She entered the premises, and was greeted with a cold AC that made her shiver. She stepped up to the Desk. “Yes ma’am, how can I help you?’ “My house was broken into. Someone butchered my Pregnant Cow and left it in my Kitchen. I’m worried for my safety, and that Animal was worth a lot to me.’ “And what is it you’re after in terms of services. An investigation, an arrest… protection?’ “The man behind the attack is… Alfie the Alawa, if you’re familiar with him at all.’ She felt silly using the name the Townsfolk dubbed him with. A man behind him, attending some file cabinets, turned. He was darker skinned, with dirty blonde hair, a Native. “You’ll want protection then, a weeks worth is 5 grande love.’ “5 Grande?’ She stammered. “I have a little girl-‘ “5 Grande. Take it or leave it.’ Said a third Officer, taking a drag on a cigarette. “OK, fine. What if nothing happens in the week you’re there?’ He tapped some of the cigarette ash onto a tray, then said remorselessly, “Then you pay for another week, or we leave.’ She became frustrated, lashing out and kicking the Desk before storming out of the building. She stayed the night in Jabiru, but didn’t get much sleep. Beyond the immediate danger the Mining company posed, her thoughts were on the future. Without that Calf, and two of her adult Cows well into their twilight years, she wondered if she had a future in the Valley at all. On the Drive home the next morning, she didn’t have much else to occupy her mind. She nervously clutched the Wheel, her knuckles turning white, she wanted the comfort of home moreso than anything now. She parked outside the Ranch, and approached the Kitchen Door. Bill had done a good job of cleaning up, but it still took some convincing before Casey would set foot inside. “Bill, we’re back.’ She called, “Thanks for taking care of the mess,’ There was no reply. She entered the Hall and felt the House precariously empty. She went to check the mail at the foot of the front door, and picking up the many unimportant letters, she noticed door-handle loosened, and partially hanging. She went to test it, and the screws came undone as she did so. “What the fuck.’ She said to herself. She heard Casey’s voice from somewhere in the house, and focusing on the sound, a second more masculine voice joined hers. “Bill?’ She called. She walked down the hall, toward their voices. “What happened to the Door-‘ Her words were cut short as she entered the Living room. Sat on the recliner was a complete stranger, Casey’s hands were in his, and when he addressed her- he smiled. “I’ve been waiting all day,’ He said. Casey pulled her hands away. “I’ll go make your Tea,’ She said in a frightened voice, before hurrying to her mothers side. “Who the fuck are you?’ He cleared his throat. “I’m here to negotiate the acquisition of your plot,’ He stood, approaching her. Casey cowered behind her mothers legs. The man put a hand out, the smell of cigarette ash and dust emanating from him. “I’m Alfie. Head foreman at the Alawa copper mine,’ She shook his hand instinctively, feeling Casey’s panicked breaths against the back of her thigh. “Honey why don’t you head on upstairs. I’ll be up soon.’ She said, the young girl nodded reluctantly and left. The two sat down, and Alfie opened the discussions, “My reputation has preceded me, I can tell by how sweaty your hand was. But, well, I’m running out of patience with you people. To begin with I was very kind, and understanding, you have become attached to this land, of course, anyone would it’s beautiful sunny pastures are a great allure. But, alas, it’s not your land. It’s mine.’ “Yours? How do you reckon, I bought this plot years ago, me and my Husband split even on it. It’s mine by right.’ “This was, when, the 90s?’ “95,’ She answered. “95. So, 15 years after the War of Extermination on my people.’ He paused, “The Alawa Copper company. What do you suppose that name means?’ She became colder, even in the sweltering heat. “The Alawa Tribe, my Tribe, inhabited this land for many thousands of years. Stories, culture, art, were passed down generation after generation. All of it an ode in some way or another to these plains. Now, my people don’t even remember their true names. Alfie, I have to carry that burdenous name because of you people.’ He spat on the floor. “Look, just by being here, you’re not abiding by the Non-Aggression policy,’ “Wrong. Your presence here, as the true trespasser, is breaking the new Law of our Country. My being here is an act of retaliation. By right I could do to you what I did to that War Criminal William Forrest,’ Her eyes widened. “What the fuck have you done to Bill?’ "He's not dead, darlin'. Nah, that'd be too good for him.’ He said. “I want you off this plot. I want all of you gone before the White parliamentarian Devil’s kick that pillock Cresswell out of office. My Tribe will re-establish itself before that time comes and we’ll be in a lawful position to start anew. As for Ole’ Billy, he’s taking a nap upstairs.’ As Elyssa sprang out of her seat, Alfie grabbed her wrist. “I’ll be back.’ “Look!’ She yanked her hand away. “12th of December. I’ll sign a document, whatever you need, you can have the land back!’ He smirked, and Elyssa ran to address Casey’s weeping. “Very well,’ He said to himself, before swinging open the broken front door open, and departed the Ranch. Awaiting him outside were six trucks, each manned by a small cohort of his disgruntled followers. Upstairs, in the spare Bedroom, Bill had been chained to the bedframe and all manner of beatings had been dished out. His teeth were fractured, his eyes swollen, and nose and jaw broken. She immediately sent Casey to the Shed to fetch the cable-cutters while she assessed him with tears in her eyes. When Casey returned, they freed him and rushed to the Hospital. Casey remained in the back seat, feeling lost and confused, and sobbed. Bill was in and out of consciousness on the way there, and his only words were to comfort his Grand-niece. The Hospital lobby was hectic. The smoke from Wildfires had wreaked havoc on the elderly, and infants struggled with heat-stroke. Scared Parents, sons, and Daughters alike waited for room and board for their sick relatives. Casey had buried her face into Elyssa’s side and refused to budge. Elyssa’s eyes drifted toward a payphone, and with Bill put up for the night, she went to dial a number. She dialled for the local police Department, which no longer answered to a 3-digit emergency phone number. “Hello? Yes, my name is Elyssa Rutherford. I inquired about a weeks protection, and was given a price of $5000. I’d like to organise that weeks protection now please.’ The man on the other end sorted through some files and recorded some Details. She was asked to give a Date of arrival, “Get here for the morning of December 12th, please,’ She said. “Thank you.’ She hung up, and popped in another quarter to call Gladice. Over the phone she was frantic upon hearing about Bill’s condition, and spouted every racial epithet that existed to describe their Indigenous neighbour’s. When Casey’s name was mentioned the elderly woman forced herself to calm, and agreed to keep her over the coming week. “Alright Angel, It’s time to go to Auntie Gladice’s.’ She said softly, stroking Casey’s face that had become red with tears and fixed with a traumatised expression. Back at the Ranch, Elyssa meandered from room to room, her feet as restless as her mind. She went upstairs and every step felt like a task. She leaned on the doorway of the Spare room, and when she saw the carpet around the bed was stained red her eyes filled with tears. After cleaning up the last of the evidence of her uncles ordeal she went to collapse onto her bed, and upon seeing her Husband's image, who was lost to her when he took a bullet in the gut during the Bloody River Conflict, she wept. She wept until her eyes blurred over with tears, and when she grew tired of blinking them away she let her eyelids rest. Soon the sound of her sobs faded away, and she slept. The Morning of Wednesday, the 11th of December, she tried her best to keep her wits about her and go about the workday as though nothing was wrong. She wrote out a check for the Police Force, and put it in an envelope. Reimbursement, if I should die. She wrote on it. After letting out the Cows to roam she sat down on her Porch, and smiled at the storm clouds forming on the Horizon. Her mind cast back to the Hospital Lobby, to all those affected by the heat, and she felt optimistic for once. The Paperboy came by, and upon seeing her, approached with the paper in hand rather than tossing it like a frisbee. He seemed to think on giving it to her, but opted to put it on the front step while maintaining awkward eye contact before promptly running back to his bike. She picked it up to read, and her optimism was cut short. Two homesteads had burnt to the ground in her area. She ripped through the pages quickly, the Tanner and Dorf residences. Clear arson cases. She posited that Alfie didn’t want the Properties at all, he simply wanted the tenants gone. He truly wanted his land back. After finishing up the last chores for the day she collapsed into bed, exhausted. She gazed at her Husbands trunk sat beneath the Bedroom window and fell asleep. When she awoke on the 12th of December, the Trunk was the first thing she saw. She shot out of bed and noted that it was at least 6AM, just by seeing where the sun sat in the sky. Plenty of time, she thought. She popped the Trunk open and inside sat a Shotgun, shells, a knife, and a few of his other personal belongings from the Army. As she loaded the shells and kept vigil from the bedroom window, she saw a pair of Police Cars park up outside. A flash of lightning reflected in the picture-frame on her nightstand, as thunder roared in the distance. She looked at the image of her husband, and pumped a round into the firing chamber. “Miss,’ The Police Officer addressed her at the Door, with five other Officers. “We’re from the Jabiru Department, we’ve got orders to keep an eye on the Ranch for the next seven days.’ She’d kept the gun upstairs, and innocently invited them in for some coffee. “Are you expecting trouble at any point today?’ One of the Officers asked. “Not expecting, no, but this Alawa bloke’s been terrorising everyone around here. We just don’t know what’s going to happen.’ “We? Who else lives with you Mrs. Rutherford’ “I’m a widow, and my only Daughters somewhere safe. I’m on my own.’ “I see. Yea Alfie’s been a nuisance recently. Got half the department investigating the resent arsons down river.’ “Yea? Is that why there’s only six of yous?’ She inquired, trying not to sound embittered. “Six is plenty love, trust me, these are working boys not gangsters. Once they see us,’ He raised his Pistol, “once they see this, none of those cunts’ll bother you again.’ The other Officers snickered, making themselves at home. “Turn the TV on if you want,’ She called over, leaning on her Kitchen island with a quiet sigh. The Rains came in the early Afternoon, preventing her from attending to the bulk of her duties. Two Officers posted up on the Front Porch, while the Captain remained in the Living Room watching a Gameshow. The remainder gathered some basic details about the case, and set off in their patrol vehicle to monitor the only road bypassing her property. She sat down beside the Police Captain, who promptly switched channels to the News as she entered. The rains had invigorated unrest in the Capital, and the anarchist party had become victims of their own philosophy. Two Officials had been burnt alive at the stake. Among the police they hired as protection, many were injured, and some had even been killed in the violence. A Protestor was Interviewed, she said, “These men had taken out money from the private fund that’s supposed to keep our fire department ready for any kind of disaster. They spent it on golf! Fucking golf! They violated the NAP by aggressing against the interests and compromising the safety of the public, they deserve to burn—’ The Police captain switched off the TV. They sat in silence while he nursed his coffee gingerly. They heard the screech of tires outside, and snapped toward the front window. The Patrol car was back. “What’s goin on Henry?’ The Captain asked, as the Officer driving the Car hurried toward the House. “We saw a Convoy, all the vehicles had the Alawa Logo.’ “Get a look at what they were packin?’ “Nah, just took a u-turn. Didn’t want heat.’ “Ping em a few next time, blow their tyres out, they’ve probably brought gasoline, a lighter and a bunch of pipes and miners picks.’ “Any of em Indiginous?’ Another Officer asked, she recognised him as the Native from the Police station. “Yea, few Abos, whats it matter?’ Henry muttered nervously. The Officer didn’t reply. They all took shelter from the growing storm in the house. The Officers attitudes had changed, the banter between them had stopped, and they patrolled from window to window keeping a watch over the plot. Elyssa remained in her Bedroom, her Shotgun rested on her lap. When she shut her eyes, she imagined the weight to be Casey resting on her lap. A scream of Thunder jolted her back to reality. She heard commotion downstairs, and rushed into the Spare Bedroom where she had a view of the front. Alfie had arrived. She saw the Police captain walk out, holding his arms up. Shows over, she could imagine him saying, as if hassling a group of rowdy teenagers. She saw Alfie himself step forward with courteous body language. For a moment, as Alfie and the Police Captain spoke, she thought she was in the clear. The draw where she left their money came fresh to memory, as a wave of gratitude washed over her. Alfie turned, and walked back to his vehicle. “They’re leaving…’ She said giddily. But before his whole body entered the Car, he spun around wielding a machine gun. The Captain had no time to pull his pistol off his belt, and was gunned down. Alfie carried on pouring rounds into the Captain until he was a mound of red in a puddle of his own blood. His Goons pulled out their own firearms, concealed either on their persons or in their cars. The Firefight had began. Interwoven with the sounds of the storm guns were fired and bullets blew through the hardwood exterior of her precious home. Elyssa didn’t know what to do, so she hurried to her bedroom and shut the door. She paced around, as screams sounded off on the floor below. She looked out her window, and saw a Police Officer sprint out the back Kitchen door and vault the fence onto her Pasture before he too was shot down from range. She looked to her Cattle, stirring restlessly in their shelter. Alfie’s men formed a line, and took aim, ripping her livestock to shreds with their firepower. She began to cry, feeling intense guilt, her daughters face flashing in her mind. She heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and screamed as one of the Alawa’s thugs kicked the door down. She fired at the first that entered, felling the man, then fumbled to pump another round into the chamber. She paused for a moment, as the Native Officer entered. He stood shoulder to shoulder with the other armed insurgents. “This is Elyssa Forrester, ain’t it,’ One of them said gruffly, “Doesn’t have her Uncle’s knack for Rifles eh.’ “O-Officer, please, help me. They’re in my House. They’re in my room.’ They shared a grim moment of laughter. “John!’ She wailed involuntarily. As the violent protests subside with the mob lynching of Prime Minister Cresswell, the Rains promise even more hope for the Australian people. According to Forecasters the hottest days of the year have passed… Casey sat staring at the TV set, ignorant to what the Reporter was saying, but enraptured all the same. She heartily ate the Brownies prepared by her Auntie Gladice who was mashing potatoes In the Kitchen. The Doorbell rang, and Bill struggled to his feet to answer it. “Honey, let me!’ Gladice urged. “No, no, forget it, I’m not a cripple.’ Bill trailed off under his breath, His voice was distorted by Jaw Surgery, and his face was still wrapped heavily in bandages. He opened the door and looked into the empty darkness beyond. The rains were still nourishing the land plentifully. He heard a Car start and drive away in the near distance and stepped out to investigate. He kicked something away from the light beaming through his front door. “What the hell?’ He mumbled. He stepped out into the stormy night and picked up the object. It was round and obscure and he felt hair. Long hair. He turned the object around as his breath caught in his throat as tears filled his damaged eyes. He held it shakily, then brought it close to his chest. “She had nothing to do with it! You should’ve killed me… It should’ve been me!’ He bellowed into the night. Elyssa’s dismembered Head had been dropped onto his doorstep, with a crude and bloody A engraved onto her face.
2020.01.13 10:06 Simon_in_OzBackground to The Sacred Curse
A good one-eyed friend has kindly posted a review of my latest book The Sacred Curse. Here's some of the background to my involvement with the DNA issue, and the writing of the book, for more recent escapees. From past experience anything I post will get heavily downvoted, but let's see how we go. In 1998, while serving as a bishop in Brisbane, I discovered that scientists had failed to detect any sign of Middle Eastern DNA in Native Americans after testing the maternal ancestries of over 7,000 living and ancient individuals. After two weeks in the land of doublethink, my faith crashed. When I raised my questions with church leaders I was met with ecclesiastical bullying and shaming and directed to FARMS. Members in Brisbane were warned not to speak to Simon Southerton because Satan had deceived him. My seven sisters and mother have refused to seriously ponder what is clearly a serious problem for the Book of Mormon. Lamanite DNA has vanished. Instead they have been drawn to paid apologists and snake oil salesmen. Realising that the church was digging its heels in on DNA, and apologists were obscuring the science, I started writing Losing a Lost Tribe, Native Americans, DNA and the Mormon Church, which was published by Signature Books in Salt Lake City in 2004. In response to my book there were news stories on the DNA issue published in leading newspapers in the UK, Australia and right across the US. The very well funded Mormon Church public relations machine swung into action. The Introduction to the Book of Mormon got a very quiet update a year later. The Lamanites were suddenly “among” rather than the “principal” ancestors of the American Indians. President Newsroom then reassured the members the DNA science is very complicated and they needed to listen to LDS experts who were not troubled by it. It’s not all that complicated. Even Ancestry.com knows Native Americans don't have pre-Columbian Jewish DNA. It turns out if you make Mormons afraid their careers will be destroyed (i.e. they will be excommunicated) if they publicly question the historicity of the Book of Mormon, you get scholars who will abuse science to defend its historicity (apologists). Many apologists are employees of the church and have large circles of friends and work colleagues who are Latter-day Saints. This all combines to create extraordinarily powerful incentives for LDS apologists to gloss over uncomfortable facts and to see what they want to see in the science. Since publishing my book, Mormon apologists have attacked me personally, questioned my intelligence and scientific credentials, my motives, and my knowledge of what the Book of Mormon really says. They have exaggerated the limitations of DNA science, obscured the true facts it has revealed and even made false claims of positive evidence. They have also twisted the Book of Mormon narrative into a bizarre story that reduces the Lamanites to a sideshow in the New World. During the last ten years scientists have been combing our entire genome for its ancestral secrets. Our genome is enormous. Just as our computer’s hard drive seems to remember everything we do; our genome carries a huge amount of information, 3 billion DNA letters worth, about our ancestry. If there were small traces of Jewish DNA in Native Americans it would be easy to detect it. In addition to discovering Neanderthal genes lurking in our DNA, whole genome studies have shed far greater light on the origins, timing and route of human migrations into the Americas and the Pacific. In The Sacred Curse I reveal how, at a BYU roundtable in 1969, Mormon scholars admitted that decades of archaeological research had failed to find a single piece of evidence in support of the Book of Mormon. At the same meeting John Sorenson introduced his new strategy for overcoming this problem – parallelomania. For 50 years Sorenson has blinded us with countless weak parallels between Native American cultures and the Middle East. Even other apologists now acknowledge parallelomania is a “fundamentally flawed methodology” (Brant Gardner and Mark Wright). Meanwhile Sorenson’s most ardent fans (Daniel Peterson, Louis Midgley, Terryl Givens, Matthew Roper etc) have lauded his abuse of science to the point of deification. I also take a critical look at Limited Geography apologetics. While claiming to “have no position on geography” the LDS church has invested almost exclusively in the Mesoamerican limited geography theory championed by Sorenson. This model reduces the Lehites to an elite minority who helped kick off the Mayan civilization. Given the intellectual contortions required to square this model with the Book of Mormon, it was inevitable that someone like Rodney Meldrum would come along. I devote an entire chapter to discussing the emergence of his movement and the young earth creationist nonsense that Heartland Inc. is built on. Despite massive studies aimed at discovering additional non-Asian ancestors (yes, even Lamanite DNA if it was there) no trace of pre-Columbian Israelite DNA has been found in any of the thousands of indigenous people tested to date. DNA genealogy research continues to reveal the true history of indigenous peoples and, by implication, the 19th century origins of Mormonism’s racist keystone scripture. The Book of Mormon is 19th century fiction, dressed as scripture, and it has caused untold harm to First Nations people. This must stop because it is not true history. The Mormon Church needs to stop bullying and intimidating members who cannot believe the historicity of the Book of Mormon, because as the father of President Henry B. Eyring once said, "you don't have to believe anything that isn't true." - Henry Eyring. The Sacred Curse provides “the most accessible and succinct scientific refutation of Mormonism’s Lamanite mythology” (Thomas Murphy). We now know Native Americans and Polynesians do not carry pre-Columbian Israelite genes in their DNA. The Lamanites never physically existed. It hurts First Nations people to insist they are the descendants of a race cursed by God with a dark skin. The Mormon Church needs to honestly face these facts.
You’ve been loved-bombed with quite a lot of Heartland creationist pseudoscience recently. I thought some of you might appreciate an alternative viewpoint based on science. It's been sixteen years since I published Losing a Lost Tribe (Signature Books). It’s long past time for an update. I have just published The Sacred Curse, and it can be purchased as a PDF at a very reasonable price from my website (https://simonsoutherton.com/). My daughter Olly provided the beautiful cover art for my book. I hope you don't mind me sharing it. https://preview.redd.it/lvhjtwdmyga41.png?width=292&format=png&auto=webp&s=b788254bd9ca8a5255933e2ba3c48ff9a3bc4b6c Many of you will not be aware of the history of the DNA debate. Here is a brief summary of my involvement in the issue leading up to my new book. In 1998, while serving as a bishop in Brisbane, I discovered that scientists had failed to detect any sign of Middle Eastern DNA in Native Americans after testing the maternal ancestries of over 7,000 living and ancient individuals. After two weeks in the land of doublethink, my faith crashed. When I raised my questions with church leaders I was met with ecclesiastical bullying and shaming and directed to FARMS. Members in Brisbane were warned not to speak to Simon Southerton because Satan had deceived him. My seven sisters and mother have refused to seriously ponder what is clearly a serious problem for the Book of Mormon. Lamanite DNA has vanished. Instead they have been drawn to paid apologists and snake oil salesmen. Realising that the church was digging its heels in on DNA, and apologists were obscuring the science, I started writing Losing a Lost Tribe, Native Americans, DNA and the Mormon Church, which was published by Signature Books in Salt Lake City in 2004. In response to my book there were news stories on the DNA issue published in leading newspapers in the UK, Australia and right across the US. The very well funded Mormon Church public relations machine swung into action. The Introduction to the Book of Mormon got a very quiet update a year later. The Lamanites were suddenly “among” rather than the “principal” ancestors of the American Indians. President Newsroom then reassured the members the DNA science is very complicated and they needed to listen to LDS experts who were not troubled by it. It’s not all that complicated. Even Ancestry.com knows Native Americans don't have pre-Columbian Jewish DNA. It turns out if you make Mormons afraid their careers will be destroyed (i.e. they will be excommunicated) if they publicly question the historicity of the Book of Mormon, you get scholars who will abuse science to defend its historicity (apologists). Many apologists are employees of the church and have large circles of friends and work colleagues who are Latter-day Saints. This all combines to create extraordinarily powerful incentives for LDS apologists to gloss over uncomfortable facts and to see what they want to see in the science. Since publishing my book, Mormon apologists have attacked me personally, questioned my intelligence and scientific credentials, my motives, and my knowledge of what the Book of Mormon really says. They have exaggerated the limitations of DNA science, obscured the true facts it has revealed and even made false claims of positive evidence. They have also twisted the Book of Mormon narrative into a bizarre story that reduces the Lamanites to a sideshow in the New World. During the last ten years scientists have been combing our entire genome for its ancestral secrets. Our genome is enormous. Just as our computer’s hard drive seems to remember everything we do; our genome carries a huge amount of information, 3 billion DNA letters worth, about our ancestry. If there were small traces of Jewish DNA in Native Americans it would be easy to detect it. In addition to discovering Neanderthal genes lurking in our DNA, whole genome studies have shed far greater light on the origins, timing and route of human migrations into the Americas and the Pacific. In The Sacred Curse I reveal how, at a BYU roundtable in 1969, Mormon scholars admitted that decades of archaeological research had failed to find a single piece of evidence in support of the Book of Mormon. At the same meeting John Sorenson introduced his new strategy for overcoming this problem – parallelomania. For 50 years Sorenson has blinded us with countless weak parallels between Native American cultures and the Middle East. Even other apologists now acknowledge parallelomania is a “fundamentally flawed methodology” (Brant Gardner and Mark Wright). Meanwhile Sorenson’s most ardent fans (Daniel Peterson, Louis Midgley, Terryl Givens, Matthew Roper etc) have lauded his abuse of science to the point of deification. I also take a critical look at Limited Geography apologetics. While claiming to “have no position on geography” the LDS church has invested almost exclusively in the Mesoamerican limited geography theory championed by Sorenson. This model reduces the Lehites to an elite minority who helped kick off the Mayan civilization. Given the intellectual contortions required to square this model with the Book of Mormon, it was inevitable that someone like Rodney Meldrum would come along. I devote an entire chapter to discussing the emergence of his movement and the young earth creationist nonsense that Heartland Inc. is built on. Despite massive studies aimed at discovering additional non-Asian ancestors (yes, even Lamanite DNA if it was there) no trace of pre-Columbian Israelite DNA has been found in any of the thousands of indigenous people tested to date. DNA genealogy research continues to reveal the true history of indigenous peoples and, by implication, the 19th century origins of Mormonism’s racist keystone scripture. The Book of Mormon is 19th century fiction, dressed as scripture, and it has caused untold harm to First Nations people. This must stop because it is not true history. The Mormon Church needs to stop bullying and intimidating members who cannot believe the historicity of the Book of Mormon, because as the father of President Henry B. Eyring once said, "you don't have to believe anything that isn't true." - Henry Eyring. The Sacred Curse provides “the most accessible and succinct scientific refutation of Mormonism’s Lamanite mythology” (Thomas Murphy). I believe it contains irrefutable scientific evidence against the historicity of the Book of Mormon. We now know for a fact Native Americans and Polynesians do not carry pre-Columbian Israelite genes in their DNA. The Lamanites never physically existed. The Mormon Church needs to honestly face that fact.
2020.01.04 19:58 ZappaOMatic[OC] The inaugural NASCAR Strictly Stock race: Where are they now?
TL;DR: Mostly but (probably?) not completely dead On June 19, 1949, the NASCAR Strictly Stock Division took to the dirt of Charlotte Speedway for a 200-lap showdown. Little did those in attendance know that this was the start of something special: the birth of the NASCAR Cup Series. But what happened to the 33 drivers in the field for that race? What are they up to? Let's find out! This isn't going to be a comprehensive bio of the drivers, but rather just a brief mention of what they did before the inaugural race, how/why they entered, and what happened since (and if they are alive or not). Amusingly, this post came too dangerously close to the character limit before I could even finish the top 20, so I had to split the rest of the field as a comment below. 1. Jim Roper The first-ever winner, Jim Roper took the victory in rather controversial circumstances as original race winner Glenn Dunaway was disqualified; Roper, who finished second and three laps down, was declared the winner. The Great Bend, Kansas native found out about the race while reading a comic strip from Zack Moseley's The Adventures of Smilin' Jack. Interested, he acquired a 1949 Lincoln Cosmopolitan from local dealer Millard James Clothier Sr. and supported by Charlotte dealership Mecklenburg Motors. He would run just one more NASCAR Strictly Stock/Cup race in his career, a fifteenth-place run later in 1949 at Occoneechee Speedway. Roper later returned to Kansas, where he continued racing in IMCA-sanctioned events and jalopies. A serious injury in a 1955 crash ended his racing career (outside of a one-off at the Kansas State Fairgrounds in 1961). He eventually settled in Texas and raised horses. He died on June 23, 2000 at a retirement home. He had been battling cancer and heart/liver complications in his final years. His gravestone at Halstead Cemetery mentions his Charlotte win (though in this 2009 photo, it states Charlotte Motor Speedway, which is not the same track). 2. Fonty Flock Runner-up to Roper, Fonty Flock drove a 1949 Hudson in the race. In 1949, Fonty Flock won the NASCAR Modified championship. Entering the Strictly Stock inaugural race, he was dominating the standings with over 300 points on second-placed Curtis Turner. Just two years before, he was named the first NASCAR (then the National Championship Stock Car Circuit) champion. Flock ran the inaugural race with his brothers Tim and Bob, and the three were also joined by their sister Ethel Mobley the following round at Daytona Beach. The Flock family was NASCAR's premier family during the 1950s, with Fonty famously winning the 1952 Southern 500 in Bermuda shorts and eventually leading the fans in singing "Dixie" while standing on his car's hood. He would win 19 races in his Grand National career before retiring in 1958. Flock died on July 15, 1972 after a bout with cancer. 3. Red Byron I don't think Red Byron needs any introduction. A World War II B-24 Liberator tail-gunner who raced with a left leg brace bolted to the clutch pedal, Modified champion, inaugural Strictly Stock/Cup champion, Hall of Famer, the list goes on. After finishing third at Charlotte, he won the next race at Daytona Beach and ended his 1949 season with two wins and the title. He continued racing until health problems ended his career 1951, but remained involved in racing in the sports car world. He was preparing plans to start a sports car team when he suffered a fatal heart attack in his Chicago hotel room on November 11, 1960. He is buried at Pinecrest Cemetery in Lake Worth, Florida, where his tombstone mentions his military service. "Ironically, the man who had brought millions of hearts to the verge of failure in fans around the world, was sent through the rail for the last time by failure of his own heart," The Anniston Star's George Smith wrote a week after his passing. "The man who chose country over racing, and then racing over pain," ESPN's Ryan McGee wrote in his 2012 Veterans Day tribute to Byron. "American race fans continue to benefit from both." 4. Sam Rice J. Sam Rice ran just one more Strictly Stock race in his career: another fourth-place finish at Heidelberg Raceway. That said, Rice was more well-known for his exploits outside of the cockpit. In 1947, Rice and his friend H. Clay Earles built Martinsville Speedway, with Rice serving as the first track president. Rice also owned cars for a decade, fielding rides in the 1950s for those like Fireball Roberts and Bill Blair. Although Racing-Reference has a driver and owner page for Rice, they have different death dates thanks to some confusion in the comments on the former: the driver bio says he died on July 9, 1976, while the owner one says February 19, 2010 thanks to the wording of a News & Record article from that same date. Since he was born in 1904, he would have been 106 if he died in 2010 (while centenarians aren't that rare, one being such a prominent figure in NASCAR should have spawned at least some discussion), plus Find A Grave supports his death at the age of 72 in 1976. 5. Tim Flock Fonty's younger brother, Tim Flock drove an Oldsmobile 88 that he borrowed from his recently-married neighbors in the race. He recalled in 1997:
"They had thousands of people show up just to watch practice! That traffic was so bad and everybody was in it. You'd have race cars next to family cars, all jammed up, and the only reason you knew the difference between the racers and the regular people was that the racers had a number taped on their door. Like, a number made out of duct tape."
After his top five at Charlotte, he would enjoy a prolific career in the Grand National Series as he won 39 races and two series championships in 1952 and 1955. Of course, many also know him as the driver who had the monkey Jocko Flocko riding with him. One of his race victories came at Road America in 1956. The race, which received the seal of approval from the FIA, drew plenty of attention as many wondered how stock cars would handle the road course; Lee Petty even remarked, "the way I figure it, this race will be won by the driver who can go the fastest the slowest." The reigning champion Flock tailed pole winner and points leader Buck Baker for much of the early stages, but as the race leaders began exiting with various issues (Baker ran out of fuel, Curtis Turner hit the hay bales after losing his brakes, Joe Weatherly suffered a rear end issue, and Speedy Thompson's engine failed), Flock found himself in front. He led the final ten laps to win what is currently the first and only Cup race at Road America. He continued to race until 1961. That year, he and Curtis Turner attempted to form a driver's union with the support of the Teamsters and Jimmy Hoffa, leading to their lifetime ban. While they were eventually reinstated, Flock was more than happy to continue his new life working at Charlotte Motor Speedway. Flock, a future NASCAR Hall of Famer, was diagnosed with throat cancer in February 1998. He died on March 31. He is buried at Sunset Memory Gardens in Mint Hill, North Carolina. 6. Archie Smith Archie Smith of Denton was a relatively new face in the field at Charlotte in 1949. Still in his teens at the time, he received word of the race when he overheard a commercial on the radio. In a 2002 article by David Poole of The Charlotte Observer, Smith recalled: "It cost $25 to enter. Nobody had that. I was working for 75 cents an hour and my daddy didn't want me to go. But he finally agreed to loan me the money. "It was my personal car. We taped the headlights up and taped a number on the side. [...] We had to buckle the doors closed and we had to have a seat belt. I bought an old horse harness at the hardware for a seat belt and used a regular old leather belt around the doors so they wouldn't fly open." Speaking of daddy, his father Frank Smith was also part of the starting lineup. Even before the race, the father and son duo were quick to try a different tactic from everyone else: the two went to the local airport and filled their cars with airplane fuel. When they were caught, they brushed the gas off as for the race. Shortly prior to the green flag, Smith's car failed to start, forcing him to call his friend on pit road to blow out the gas line before he could get going. He finished the race sixth; had he won, Smith remarked, "I probably would have stayed in [NASCAR]. I was as good as any of them, I thought." Smith ran just one more NASCAR race in his career, finishing tenth at that year's Martinsville event. He noted he didn't wear a helmet. Although he never stuck around in NASCAR, he continued racing in drag racing with General Motors and at Bowman Gray Stadium. He was the last living driver from the inaugural race, and is presumably still alive. An interview with him from 2012 can be watched here. edit: Scratch that, he passed away last December 7. Sterling Long Sterling Long ran three Strictly Stock/Grand National races, two in 1949 and one in 1950: after his seventh at Charlotte, he finished 28th and 26th at Occoneechee Speedway. The Charlotte Observer's August 9, 1950 issue had the following to say about his entry in that year's race:
Sterling Long, Greensboro resident and formerly of Charlotte, today filed his entry for the 100-mile Grand National Circuit racae for late model automobiles slated for the fast Occoneechee one mile speedway Sunday afternoon. Long will be driving a 1950 Hudson, the first Hudson entered for the speed classic being directed by Bill France under NASCAR sanction. France anticipates a field of some 30 to 40 drivers for the big race, classed as Eastern North Carolina's biggest race of the season and one that may not be duplicated for years to come in the face of the present war crisis.
In his write-up on Racers Reunion, Tim Leeming wrote of Long's 26th-place run: "During the race, Sterling Long wrecked his Hudson in a spectacular series of flips but climbed from the destroyed car unhurt." According to Racing-Reference, he died on November 28, 1987, which would align with this Find A Grave memorial which adds he s buried in Soles Cemetery in Tabor City. 8. Slick Smith How slick is Ebenezer "Slick" Smith? Slick enough to race in the Grand National Series for seven years, including much of the 1953 schedule, with 18 career top tens and a best finish of fourth at North Wilkesboro in 1954. A good number of his starts in both Grand National and Modifieds came in cars owned by fellow driver Frank Christian, usually running as teammates to Frank and his wife/fellow inaugural racer Sara. He also won a pole at Raleigh in 1953, prompting The Gaston Gazette's NASCAR This Week page to give him a shout-out in their 2006 season preview:
Ever heard of Danny Weinberg? How about Slick Smith? Pat Kirkwood? All are among the 201 drivers who have won at least one pole in the history of NASCAR's premier series.
In 1950, Smith ran the North Wilkesboro race in a Nash Ambassador that was used by Bill France and Curtis Turner in the 1947 Carrera Panamericana. Nash, which eventually became part of American Motors Corporation after its parent Nash-Kelvinator merged with Hudson, was the first manufacturer to provide factory support in NASCAR. Racing-Reference says Smith died on January 27, 1997. 9. Curtis Turner Like Byron, Curtis Turner probably doesn't need much of an introduction. A driver with a colorful and infamous reputation (most famously his then-lifetime ban in the 1961 for his efforts in forming a driver's union alongside Tim Flock), he missed out on the NASCAR title in 1949 but was voted Most Popular Driver and Most Outstanding Modified Driver. It's quite fitting that Turner finished next to Slick Smith; besides Smith driving Turner and France's Nash Ambassador at North Wilkesboro in 1950, Turner was responsible for Nash's lone NASCAR victory in 1951 at Charlotte. The 2016 NASCAR Hall of Fame inductee and golfer Clarence King were killed in a plane crash on October 4, 1970 in Pennsylvania; he was 46. Earlier, he had been participating in an exhibition race at Rockingham and was preparing for a special one-off return in the following week's National 500 at Charlotte. Turner is buried at Blue Ridge Memorial Gardens in Roanoke, Virginia. 10. Jimmy Thompson Even before the inaugural Strictly Stock race, Jimmy Thompson was on NASCAR's shit list. During the sanctioning body's early years, Bill France cracked down on various drivers like Thompson, Marshall Teague, Speedy Thompson, Ed Samples, and Buddy Shuman for various reasons; Teague, who was NASCAR's first treasurer in 1947, was banned after he and France got into arguments over changing the prize money from a flat amount to 40 percent of the gate receipts. Thompson drew France's wrath when he and Teague bailed on NASCAR events to compete in other series, while the other drivers (who also ran different series) all received suspensions when they were caught placing thumbtacks on the track before a Modified event. France's official reason for their blacklisting? "Conduct detrimental to the best interests of the National Association of Stock Car Racing." Sounds familiar, doesn't it? However, just days before the Strictly Stocks made their debut, the suspended drivers pleaded their cases to NASCAR commissioner Cannonball Baker and were reinstated. While the other drivers received fines and were placed on probation, Thompson was fully exonerated of any wrongdoing and allowed to race in NASCAR without any sanctions. Although the other four were allowed to race in the Strictly Stocks once they paid their fines, only Thompson would enter the race. After finishing tenth in at Charlotte, he would go on to race in the Grand National Series until 1962, recording ten top tens and two top fives in 47 career races. One of his starts came in the first Daytona 500; considering the size of the new Daytona International Speedway, Thompson reportedly remarked: "There have been tracks that separated the men from the boys. But this is the track that will separate the weak from the strong long after the boys have gone home!" Just two years after ending his career, Thompson died of a heart attack in his North Carolina home on September 26, 1964. His grave in Lakeland Memorial Park mentions his naval service during World War II. 11. Buck Baker The 1956 and 1957 Grand National champion, Charlotte bus driver Buck Baker was one of the era's greatest drivers. A 46-time race winner, he was inducted into the NASCAR Hall of Fame in 2013. In 1949, Baker was chasing the Modified title, but entering the Strictly Stock race, he was quite a distance from points leader Fonty Flock. While Flock led with 1,187, Baker had fallen to seventh with 447.5 after losing sixth to Frank Mundy at Martinsville. He also ran for the National Stock Car Championship, where he finished fourth in points behind Ed Samples, Curtis Turner, and Jack Smith. Four years after the Charlotte race, Baker and some others leased the legendary Air Base Speedway, whose lone Grand National race was won by inaugural Strictly Stock pole sitter Bob Flock. Baker died on April 16, 2002 at Carolinas Medical Center while having a procedure done for his pacemaker; he was 83. His gravestone at Magnolia Memorial Gardens keeps it simple: A True Champion. "Throughout the entire racing world, I don't know of anybody who would said he didn't give 110 percent from the time they dropped the green flag until the time the race was over," son Buddy Baker said. "He was that same way in life, too." 12. Bill Blair Like many of his fellow drivers, Bill Blair got his start as a moonshine runner in the 1930s. In 1939, he began racing at the newly-constructed High Point Speedway, and he opened his own track Tri-City Speedway after World War II. A friend of Bill France, Blair drove the other Lincoln Cosmopolitan from Millard Clothier at Charlotte. He dominated much of the race as he led 145 laps, but fell out of contention when one of his pit crew members removed the radiator cap, while efforts to solve the issue with cold water led to the thermostat housing cracking. He finished 12th. Blair enjoyed a fairly successful career in the Grand National Series during the 1950s as he won three races, including a 1953 victory at Daytona Beach. He died on November 2, 1995. 13. Jack Smith A decade after running the first Strictly Stock race, Jack Smith won the Grand National Most Popular Driver Award; although he tied Junior Johnson in the voting, a second ballot allowed him to edge Johnson out. Smith, who began racing in 1947 after building his own car, would enjoy a successful career in NASCAR's top level. From 1949 to his final season 1964, he won 21 races and finishes in the top five in points three times. The Georgia native also had a bit of an odd relationship with Darlington Raceway, where his car flipped out of the track and into the parking lot in 1954, "set the new speed record for driving sideways" in 1956, and once again flew out of the speedway in 1958. In 1960, he formed a close partnership with Bud Moore, and the two became the first duo to communicate via two-way radio. Son Jackie said the following about his father: "Daddy raced in the rough and tough days. He was a man's man. He drove hard. He had broad shoulders, big arms. They raced and they fought back then." "Jack was a hell of a competitor," Moore added. "Jack was a good race driver back in his day. In his time, he was about as good as any of them that come along." Smith died on October 17, 2001 of congestive heart failure. 14. Sara Christian As mentioned in Slick Smith's segment, Sara Christian was the wife of Frank Christian. Sara's racing backstory is rather unknown, but it's inferred that she cut her teeth in women-only races called "Powder Puff Derbies" before diving into the NASCAR world with her husband. Nicknamed "The Country's Leading Woman Stock Car Driver", Sara drove a Ford owned by Frank at Charlotte. To quote The Charlotte Observer's qualifying report:
A feminine complexion was added for today's 150-mile strictly stock car classic at the New Charlotte Speedway when Sara Christian, attractive Atlanta woman driver, was granted permission to test her skill against the male speedsters and verified her qualifications by qualifying 13th in the starting field today. [...] Mrs. Christian is not a newcomer in stock car racing. In fact, the Atlanta woman has a modified stock car in which he has used to compete with men in other races, and her entry yesterday was not altogether a surprise when Race Director Bill France granted permission for her to try her skill in the long test. This, however, will definitely be her first test in long distance racing, but she was anything but afraid when she zoomed her entry around the trick track yesterday.
Mid-race, she was replaced by pole sitter Bob Flock after the latter's engine failed. Being the lone female driver in the inaugural race, it goes without saying that Christian is NASCAR's first woman driver, but it wouldn't take long for others to also come aboard. She was joined by Ethel Mobley and Louise Smith for the following race at Daytona Beach. Christian only ran six more Grand National races in her career, with six in 1949. Regardless, she scored two top tens, including a fifth at Heidelberg, both during the first season. At the end of 1949, she was named Woman of the Year by the United States Drivers Association. She died on March 7, 1980 at 61. She is buried at Pleasant Grove United Methodist Church Cemetery in Dahlonega, Georgia. 15. John Barker Barker, of Hickory, North Carolina, is the only driver in this field to not have any sort of biographical information on Racing-Reference. Anyway, he finished 15th in a 1947 Kaiser owned by Ralph Chaney. Chaney would eventually field cars for Barker in three races in 1951, where his best finish was 12th at Martinsville. Barker had seven Grand National starts that year, including four with Leo Sigman in a Studebaker. Since no info on his birth and death dates are available, it can only be assumed that he is probably dead until proven otherwise. 16. Jimmie Lewallen He might not be the greatest Jimmie in NASCAR history, but Jimmie Lewallen certainly had quite a role in it. A former moonshine runner and good friend of Bill Blair, he was part of a 12-driver group who met with Bill France at the Rex Hotel in Atlanta on October 12, 1947 to write up the initial plans for NASCAR. France even offered Lewallen a chance to "buy into NASCAR" for $500, which he rejected as he felt "it would never amount to anything." Even outside of the racing world, Lewallen was a decorated man; before helping in NASCAR's creation, he was a veteran of the Normandy invasion as he served in General George Patton's Third Army, where he was wounded twice and received the Purple Heart, Silver Star, and Bronze Star. "Huge Foot", as he was nicknamed, would race in Grand National in the 1950s and much of the Convertible Division in 1956, where he finished eleventh in points. Although he never won a race in either series, he enjoyed success in modified and sportsman series, including winning the 1950 Modified title at Bowman Gray. Lewallen died on October 16, 1995 at a Winston-Salem hospital after a battle with cancer. He is buried at Springfield Friends Meeting House Cemetery in High Point, North Carolina. 17. Lee Petty Ah, Lee Petty. Hall of Famer, father of The King, inaugural Daytona 500 winner, leader of Petty Enterprises, the list goes on. We all know Petty's story, so let's just focus on how he did in the summer of '49. Lee and 12-year-old Richard reached Charlotte Speedway in a 1948 Buick Roadmaster, which was also Lee's car of choice for the race for various reasons like size and an engine that was likely going to work quite nicely in the dirt. Said car was also not actually his, instead belonging to his neighbor Gilmer Goode who was willing to lend it to him assuming the prize money could pay off any damages. Well, Lee ended up wrecking the car. As Richard explained in Ryan McGee's article on the race:
"People complain about the traffic over there when they are trying to get to the airport," says Richard Petty. "But they should have been with us when we were trying to get to that racetrack in 1949. You might want to check and see, because I'm pretty sure there are probably some folks still stuck down there." [...] "This was the first real stock car race, you see," Richard Petty explains. "Daddy wanted to make sure he was going to be a part of that. And he really wanted to make sure he got a part of that $6,000 purse." [...] Barely half the field made it to the race's halfway mark. That's when Lee Petty lost control of his borrowed Buick and barrel-rolled it through the third turn. "My first thought was, 'I hope Daddy is OK,'" Richard remembers. "Then my second thought was, 'Oh, man, how are we gonna get home?'" [...] "When we got home that night, all I could think about was the future," Richard Petty says. "I was wondering where all this might go and I was hoping that maybe the Petty family could go along with it, and we did." The kid who became King winks. "But first we had to go tell Gilmer Goode that we had wrecked his car."
Petty died on April 5, 2000 at the Moses Cone Hospital, where he had been staying after underoing surgery for a stomach aneurysm. His passing came just three days after great-grandson Adam made his Cup debut at Texas Motor Speedway. He is buried at Level Cross United Methodist Church Cemetery in Randleman, North Carolina. 18. Skimp Hersey I'll say this in advance: Skimp Hersey has probably the darkest bio of any of the drivers here. Hailing from Florida, Hersey was a fast but unlucky driver. Although he had his race wins like a NASCAR Modified victory at Jacksonville, he received the nickname "Hard Luck Kid" in 1948 since he regularly found himself in wrecks. Despite his inconsistent finishes, his fortunes took a turn for the better during the 1949 NASCAR season, and he was eventually one of the first to race at Charlotte Speedway. Of course, he would later run the first Strictly Stock event at the track. Fast forward to June 12, 1950, when Hersey was competing in a 100-mile National Stock Car Racing Association (NSCRA) Modified race at Lakewood Speedway in Atlanta. Lakewood Speedway was not a forgiving race track. Besides various deaths, the previous year's NSCR race saw four different drivers get sent to the hospital for injuries in wrecks. Additionally, if you were going to race at Lakewood, it was imperative that you keep an extra gas can in your car; true to its name, Lakewood had a literal lake as its "infield", meaning any driver who ran out of fuel on the backstretch was basically stuck there for the rest of the race with no way to get back to pit road. As such, drivers kept the fuel can to make brief refuels when they were running low. Anyway, Hersey's car got loose in turn one and rolled, hitting the fence. The gas can in the car lost its lid during the roll, causing the cockpit to be coated in fuel. After landing in front of the stands, the car went up in flames. Five minutes later, Hersey crawled out of the burning car and sat by the wreck as he called for help). However, fire crews had to wait for the other drivers to stop before they could get to him. In the meantime, a newspaper photographer arrived on the scene... to take photos. Despite Hersey's pleas, the photographer continued his work. Police had to escort him from the track as they expected the fans to attack him for not doing anything. Once the firemen finally arrived, all of Hersey's clothes but his underwear had been burned off. He was transported to Grady Hospital but died the next day. He was 37. The race was called off after 81 laps and Jack Smith was declared the winner. Hersey is buried at Evergreen Cemetery in his hometown of St. Augustine, Florida. 19. Bob Smith Considering how common of a name Bob Smith is, it probably comes with no shock that it took quite the digging to find anything. Anyway, he had four career starts in 1949 and 1950, including the first Southern 500 in 1950 (officially the Southern Five Hundred). Incidentally, assuming they aren't the same person, the Radford, Virginia native was actually the second Bob Smith at newly-Darlington Raceway as the track's PR head also had the same name. In regards to the 1949 Charlotte race, Smith was third-fastest after the first wave of qualifying, tailing Red Byron and Curtis Turner. After ultimately starting seventh, he ended his day in 19th. Per RR, he died on February 26, 1997. 20. Otis Martin Otis Martin of Roanoke, Virginia qualified sixth at Charlotte in his 1949 Ford, right in front of Bob Smith. He finished 20th due to overheating issues. Nicknamed "Bib Overalls" since he raced while wearing the attire in question, Martin was considered a bit of a mountain man. He later ran the Martinsville race that year, but finished last, and would contest 23 series races in his career until 1954 with a best run of sixth at Charlotte in 1953. His final NASCAR start came in the 1954 Southern 500. Heck, he was even a survivor of the infamous 1949 Lakewood Speedway race mentioned earlier. However, Martin died in a car accident on November 21, 1955; ironically, Virginia had just begun a three-week period of promoting safe driving. He was 37. The Associated Press wrote the following:
A 37-year-old Henry County man was killed in an auto crash today a little more than three hours after the start of a three-week safe driving period. The first in the state for that period—and four others over the week-end boosted Virginia's 1955 traffic toll to 770—86 higher than the same time last year. Otis Mason Martin of Rt. 1, Martinsville, was killed in a single-vehicle crash on State Rt. 57, 1½ miles east of Stanleytown at 3:10 a. m. Safe Driving Day is Dec. 1. States and communities were asked to keep accident records for 10-day periods before and after that date for comparative purposes.
Otis was killed in a car wreck on Rte 57 near his hometown of Bassett Va Nov 21,1955. He was driving a 1955 Ford Fairlane with a 1952 Chrysler Hemi-Head Engine. The accident was caused by the driveshaft separating from The transmission,digging into the pavement and catapulting the vehicle into several flips. Two passengers in the car survived the accident with only minor injuries.
21. Frank Smith Father of Archie, Frank Smith supposedly did not actually run the race; according to his son, he let Jimmy Thompson drive his car at the last second. Either way, Archie maintains he and his dad were the first fatheson team in NASCAR history. Frank later ran the Occoneechee Speedway race, where he finished 14th. After a lot of confusion in RR's comments, it appears he died on March 29, 1957 at the age of 55. 22. Bill Snowden Like Skimp Hersey, Bill Snowden hailed from St. Augustine, Florida. During the 1949 season, he raced for the NASCAR Modified title, where he was hanging in ninth at the time of the Strictly Stock debut. Nicknamed "Wild Bill", Snowden was a fan favorite in his home state and outside. Considered the "hottest of the hot stock car pilots in the nation" by The Orlando Sentinel in 1951, he ran 25 Grand National races between 1949 and 1952 with top tens in 14. He was even nominated by the Florida Sports Writers Association as one of the biggest contributors to pro sports in 1950, alongside the likes of Bill France and future Baseball Hall of Fame manager Al López. Besides driving, Snowden also dabbed in team ownership, fielding rides for the likes of Curtis Turner and Fireball Roberts. After retiring from racing, he became a shrimp boat operator. He died at his home on February 2, 1959. 23. Jim Paschal Jim Paschal, who retired from the Charlotte race for overheating issues and hung out in the top 15 for the 1949 points standings, was a nominee for the 2020 NASCAR Hall of Fame class. While he wasn't one of the inductees, he enjoyed a solid and long career that saw him race across the Grand National era and into the Winston Cup name. From 1949 to 1972, he recorded 25 race wins and 230 top tens in 421 races, a nearly 55 percent top-ten rate. A short track master, all but two of his victories came on such courses. Despite his short track success, Paschal noted he "didn't have any track mastered, but I had awfully good luck at Nashville. I won three races in a row there." The two non-short track victories came in the World 600 in 1964 and 1967; his 1967 win saw him lead 335 of 400 laps, setting a race record that stood until Martin Truex Jr. smashed it in 2016. When he was inducted into the NMPA Hall of Fame in 1977, Paschal recalled:
"It was the kind of race that when you think about it, it brings a smile to your face. The press wrote that it was tires that helped me win that race and they were right. But none of them knew the trouble we went to to get the tires that we ran. "The tires that we selected to run weren't supposed to be the fast type. But we found out that they were only three to four hundredths of a second off the real fast tires -- and the tires we picked would last. The others would not. We and Goodyear were calling all over the place to try and get a full set. We would get one tire here, another tire there. We had tires coming in from everywhere. We didn't have enough tires to run the race until the morning of the race."
A modest man, Paschal was held in high regard by his peers. Richard Petty considered him a top-ten greatest driver in Cup history:
"Jim was a natural. Driving was just easy for him. He ranks as one of the best of all-time on my list." Pascal was also quite surprised by Petty's comment. I didn't figure anything like being inducted into the Hall of Fame would happen to me and I didn't figure anything like what Richard said about me would happen. To be considered one of the 10 best of all time was really a surprise."
After retiring, Paschal owned a trucking business alongside Modified driver Max Berrier. He died of cancer on July 5, 2004; he was 77. Paschal is buried at North Bend Cemetery in Jackson Creek, North Carolina. "I'm not a hero," Paschal once said after his NMPA Hall of Fame induction. "I have not done anything along these lines. I don't understand it. I thought the Hall of Fame was for heroes. "I didn't really think I would be elected to it. That's why this means so much to me." 24. B.E. Renfro The #1 driver to drive #1 came in Race #1 with B.E. Renfro (no relation to Randy Renfrow). Only ran two Strictly Stock races with a 17th at Occoneechee. However, since he went by initials, I had a hard time figuring out his full name and his identity. As such, I eventually gave up and will default to his RR: died on May 27, 2001. 25. Fred Johnson In May 1949, Fred Johnson of Hamptonville joined Bill France and NASCAR at the newly-opened Charlotte Speedway alongside fellow Johnson and North Wilkesboro native George Johnson. A month later, Fred would be the only Johnson running the inaugural Strictly Stock race at the track. In doing so, Fred connected a piece of NASCAR history to one of the sport's greatest names: Junior Johnson. After growing up in the bootlegging business, brothers Fred and Junior got into racing. Although Fred would only run seven career Grand National races (scoring two top tens) with Junior obviously being the more iconic brother, the two of them worked together and competed with one another. In 1955, the pair teamed up under B&L Motors with Junior in an Oldsmobile and Fred a Cadillac; such cars were even switched between the two during the season. Even out of the car, Fred worked with Junior Johnson & Associates as a farm manager. He died on January 7, 1991 and is interred at Pleasant Grove Baptist Church Cemetery in Ronda, North Carolina. 26th to 33rd in a comment below (damn you, character limit)